Tried to fart quietly in bed to not wake my wife but ended up forcefully shitting the bed so now she’s awake cleaning it up while I’m playing Pokémon Go
masturbation addiction is crazy stuff, i remember one time i made a vow to stop, later that day i rubbed pepper on my hands so when the urge comes i’d remember i have pepper in my hands then i’d stop, you won’t believe the urge came 11pm that night and i went three streets away to get gloves.
and glory be to the devil, that day led me to the discovery of the best way to masturbate, gloves in your hands with lube all over it.
i think deadlock is really great but i think it’s missing something… If it had a hyper intelligent, charming, talking gorilla from the moon who had a tesla canon, a bubble shield, and could rage in a primal fashion.. i think we’re getting somewhere