There’s one thing that even Covid-19 couldn’t change;
The courteousness of Singaporean road users is still inversely proportional to the distance from the city centre. People start driving like real assholes once they enter Orchard.
War is always a real-time
history lesson
at the cost of human life.
Hopefully, this time,
it’s a lesson we remember,
and a lesson we learn.
#UkraineWar
Therapist; One of the things I will be doing is to note down when your use of humour may be unhelpful.
Me: You got enough paper there, doc?Cos trust me, there are going to be many such moments.
Therapist:…
Me: And that was one of ‘em, wasn’t it?
True love is being able to kiss the forehead of the woman you love when she’s feeling sick, while pretending not to taste the
Vick’s Vaporub she just applied.
What Indian mums are trying to say to you while they’re praying;
-increase in VOLUME of chanting=
she’s trying to get your attention.
-increase in SPEED of chanting=
she wants you to get something for her.
-increase in VOL & SPEED=
you’ve screwed sth up royally GTFO from there.
Father: So, beta. Did you give a good exam and come?
—————
Yep. The whole world takes exams, but not brown students.
We are extremely generous.
According to our parents, we give exams.
Formula for Karate Kid movies;
1. Make children do your housework.
2. Try to hammer them.
3. Eventually, they will learn that the only way to prevent getting whacked is to do housework.
Karate Kid and Cobra Kai were written by Indian parents.
#StrikeFirstStrikeHardNoMercy
Desi aunties visiting each other’s houses is a neverending cycle of;
———————
Host: Will you have tea?
Guest: Are you making tea?
Host: If you’re having, I’ll make.
Guest: If you’re making, I’ll have.
————————-
...until the world ends or all the chai finishes.
BREAKING: The World Health Organization has announced that dogs cannot contract Covid-19. Dogs previously held in quarantine can now be released. To be clear, WHO let the dogs out.
NUS student-voyerpreneur.
Again.
Singapore has the best respsonse to world crisis.
Protecting citizens from viruses. Unfortunately, we can’t protect ourselves from each other.
https://t.co/sFtHyz6flV