Hannah Elizabeth

i’m probably screaming internally

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

Since my new job has me on Twitter, I made a new “professional” acct. This one will probably disappear/become finsta. If u wanna keep up with me, the new handle is just mu first name and last name. DM me if you aren’t sure how to spell.

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

Hey Siri, when’s National Give a Bitch a Break Day?

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

Why is every conversation I have with men exactly like this?
Me: *asks question/says something important*
Him: *answers/acknowledges*
Me: ok
Him:
M:
H:
M:
H:
M:
H:
M:
H:
M:
H:
M:
H:
M:
H: “wait what”

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

@brittanyhorn Yo ben was about to have a heart attack. The man was a puddle of sweat by the end of it.

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

Fuck this place, y’all.

[Philip Rucker @PhilipRucker]

Pence refused Secret Service's wishes to evacuate him from the Capitol on Jan. 6.

"I’m not getting in the car," VP told lead agent. "If I get in that vehicle, you guys are taking off. I’m not getting in the car.”

This and more from I ALONE CAN FIX IT

https://t.co/KnI2Rn2WKt

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

There’s only one right answer and we all know it

[Gretchen McCulloch now at @gretchenmcc.bsky.social @GretchenAMcC]

which one of these outfits is bouba and which is kiki

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

@espn you have one job every year and you BLEW IT #nathanshotdogcontest

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

THEY HAVE ONE JOB A YEAR

[Nate P🅰️nnu @Nate_Pannu]

I will never forgive @espn for ruining the coverage of the #NathansHotDog eating contest. They owe all Americans an apology. Especially the GOAT @joeyjaws

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

@DannyBate4 @EllenJovin @GrammarTable

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

Damn I gotta feel bad for @Ohtanitter but it feels so damn good to be proud to be a Yankee fan for once this season #NYY

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

How do I know m3n are 🗑? Because they can’t even be honest with OTHER MEN. I’ve watched my partner’s friends - bffs, childhood friends even - cancel on him so many multiple times, leave him on read, can’t be there for him ever. It’s heartbreaking. #ToxicMasculinity

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

“#EatTheRich” - vague, nebulous

“Roast David and Jackie Siegel at 250° F, basting with their own juices for 24-48 hours, or until golden brown and juicy” - specific, instructional👌🏻 #recipes #queenofversailles

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

Y’all people ain’t understanding that Embiid chooses to fall cause he’s less likely to hurt himself then by staying upright and tweaking his bad knee. #physics #heretheycome #embiid

[Cam @camfromthe216]

Joel Embiid every possession

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

@TheAthletic 🎶that’s the night that the lights went out in Georgia.
That’s the night that they fouled an innocent man
Don’t trust your son to no backwards referee
Cause they won’t call a goddamned thing for Embiid” 🎶
#PHIvsATL

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

@reba
🎶that’s the night that the lights went out in Georgia.
That’s the night that they fouled an innocent man
Don’t trust your son to no backwards referee
Cause they won’t call a goddamned thing for Embiid” 🎶

[The Athletic @TheAthletic]

The power has gone out at the 76ers-Hawks game.

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

Bruh ya gotta be more specific. This is Philly, everything we say is “crazy.” Was it just a threat or was he wildin? I NEED DETAILS @RealDealBeal23
https://t.co/bOW93dxH17

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

Plz go like this post to help me win a set of wedding bands!!
https://t.co/HABYPZ0DxP

[Hannah Elizabeth @riteousmeddler]

I’m living in a constant state of existential crisis and the only thing that makes life tolerable is Bob’s Burgers on repeat