Lovely Potatoes

As seen on KTLA. I ran the NY marathon. Drowning in bubbles. Napping on treadmills

[Lovely Potatoes @robin_991]

Uterus: cry

Me: What? Wait, why I’m not even do-

Uterus: CRY.

[Lovely Potatoes @robin_991]

@ilovepie84 😂😂😭

[Lovely Potatoes @robin_991]

It’s that time of year again where my kids love yelling BIG FAT ROBIN!!! In the backyard
Sometimes I look around and see a red breasted bird of spring … sometimes I’m alone …

[Lovely Potatoes @robin_991]

@skittle624 😘

[Stacey @skittle624]

My kids just went back to college after being home for spring break and I’m totally fine. As long as no one looks at me, speaks to me, or gets near me.

[WittySassBasket™ @WittySassBasket]

accidentally bought the wrong scent of deodorant and I don't even know who I am

[Lovely Potatoes @robin_991]

Normalize calling your kids assholes … because they’re assholes

[Ghostface Kryllah @kryzazzy]

From a purely logistical point of view, I think an octopus and a t-rex would make really great friends

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

If you’re reading this post, it’s because our servers are working

[Lovely Potatoes @robin_991]

it must be spring.
Walmart smells like chocolate.

[Stacey @skittle624]

Do you ever bend down to get something and wonder how you’re going to get back up? Yeah. Me neither.

[Aunt Cunt @AuntCunt]

Some of you need to chill all the way oot because it’s a lot

[.:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin]

men get so mad when a woman chooses to be single. it is comical.

[Ⓜ️isterD @MisterD78UK]

What I lack in how much I say I totally make up for in making it awkward as fuck when I do

[Dadman Standing @dadmann_walking]

14 just brought me homemade chocolate filled donuts holes he made. I raised him right.

[NurseBrianRN @rn_murse]

dating is 93% holding back your crazy, 18% fart suppression, and 12% math.