robmanuel

I do @b3ta / @fesshole / @anon_opin
contact email: robmanuel at gmail dot com
Buy TICKETS for my live show:

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

* I'm still alive, pinned tweet *

• I write the @b3ta newsletter every week. Subscribe https://t.co/mud99ubbY5
• I still run @fesshole and @anon_opin on almost every platform
• I personally post regularly on BlueSky https://t.co/TLukDTlmGg

Have fun my dudes

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

I have done a book and it's good. Every joke and illustration done by hand by me, which in this world of AI slop, well it's what I fancied doing as a response to it all. Hope you like it.
https://t.co/AlSE5ZoKVb

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@anon_opin It's short for gastric band as driving a car makes you fat

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@b3ta Kate Bush's Running Up That Hill Decathlon

(Cash-in ZX Spectrum games of 1980s songs)

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@dank_ackroyd As a kid, genuinely thought it was about spooning this forbidden nectar straight from the tin and into my gob.

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@PeteSelby1 Looks like my vote has swung it from 50/50 to YES!

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@LukeHaines_News

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@b3ta Film sequels where most of the cast is now dead and they're all ghosts

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@JackDunc1 I smell chatGTP - on them, not you

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@jayforeman People who say George is the best songwriter are contrarian fools. Yes, there's no question he wrote a handful of bangers but he didn't write 60 of them.

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@20thcenturymarc I'm furious. You should only be excited by meeting pop stars who were big when you were 14, thus Keir should be getting backstage with Captain & Tennille.

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@AdamKoszary "This piss was brought to you by Windows 11"

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@jackmalvern Age presumably - what with old right wing voters and any under about 40 having other, probably more exciting options, like Game Boys

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@LukeHaines_News Liver sausages sandwiches all round

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@yokoonobot One guy

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@b3ta Orwell said "Four legs good, two legs bad" - so photoshop things with two legs to have four legs. He also said "Four legs good, two legs better" so also photoshop things with four legs to have two legs.

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@erocdrahs The central message that we can scare Britain out of fascism by showing them exactly what it means has been proved wrong by events mind you

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@ItsAndyRyan @CartoonsHateHer What made me laugh about that, is that we've had vending machines for a long time. If we wanted a bar where you could press a button and get some booze, we could have had it since at least Victorian times.

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@nbcsnl The human race had a good innings - it's time for it to end now

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

@thirstykirsty77 @ricardoautobahn You've misunderstood. I'm not saying people won't come to Halifax. I'm saying that when people say "please come to ME" to comedians and musicians they're often in the arse end of nowhere, and at least when I'm doing it, it's the not that.