Baron Von Douche

Jokes & Laughter.
Retired Army Veteran.
82nd Airborne Division.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

I'm 47, unmarried, have no kids, and I've now taken in a stray cat. This "dying alone" thing is really picking up some serious fucking momentum.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

Today's kids will never know the anxiety of having to rewind dad's VHS porno to the exact spot before you started watching.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

Age 12. Walked Confederate General Pickett's Charge. Gettysburg. One mile of open ground. Fuck that shit.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@_OT__ What up Mr. Nickey 😀

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

I take online classes for my master's because I care about my education but not enough to put pants on.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

Hard to believe, if I'd invested in Microsoft in the 80's, I'd be dead of a drug overdose.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@Tendo78879854 Sad, our legendary coach Owen Hauck and two teammates.....

... Have passed on to heaven. Craig Mullins and Tony Law....

Mad respect.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

#14 Safety & backup QB.
1986 senior day with family

Boone County, Kentucky.
State At Large Champions

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

I loved my coach like a father.... Rip Mr. Hauck....

And Craig Mullins & Tony Law.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

If you paid 3 million for a recount that increased your opponents lead...
YOUR A DUMBASS

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

Sex so good you take off the Santa suit and clap.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@Hormonella Awesome 👍

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@MsGourami Ms. G ❤️

Got the morning hangover shits, everyday.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

Welcome to 40: When one huge fart throws out your back.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@Tendo78879854 Mr. Tendon 😀

I only care for the twitter laughs...

Hope to bring smiles, even if it's for a few seconds.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@Tendo78879854 I was pretty good back in the day....

But it was the 82nd Airborne Division....

... that brought out my best.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@1MeLrO Sup Ms. Melissa??

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@wilgmil11 Bribed Santa a heavy sum of money.....

.... While fuckin Mrs Claus.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

No longer on the naughty list. 😀

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@jrczyk1 Looks like I picked the wrong week....

... To quit sniffing glue.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@MZbytheBay

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

It's been 10 years since Leslie Nielsen passed away at a hospital. It's a big building with doctors and patients, but that's not important right now.

[Baron Von Douche @robwalton30]

@MZbytheBay @DanicaReaves @paigewho2 Airplane II: Rocket launchers and machine guns thru airport security.

Not so funny now.