Rogal Drorn, Garlic Toast Loyalist

Not affiliated with any IRL organization. giving political hottakes on IRL topics and 40k. PFP is by the amazing @RealSvyart, CDL Driving

[Nacionalista LM 🇧🇷 ✝️ 🤍 @Nacionalista_LM]

Eu estava voltando para casa caminhando na rua quando o Netanyahu surgiu em minha frente chorando. Ele me disse :"Eu juro que eu tentei, seu goy imundo, eu tentei te dar uma esposa assim, mas eles não me deixaram", então eu perguntei quem eram eles.
"Goblins banqueiros" ele disse

[Kapt'n Krunch 🛠️⚓ @KaptainKrunch97]

I’ve just started retweeting Malfoid like it’s muscle memory inbetween Ace Combat 8 missions and no time to read any of the spoken text, so I go back through my retweets to read all of them proper like

[Tyler Small @TylerSmall812]

Female Draco/Malfoid is so genius that it’s possibly the biggest missed opportunity in the whole series. And what makes it crazy is that you barely have to change the story.

Most of the major scenes could happen almost exactly as written. You’d just add an entirely different layer underneath them. Harry and Malfoy still hate each other. They’re still rivals. She’s still an arrogant, spoiled pure-blood supremacist from a family that represents almost everything Harry despises. But somewhere underneath all of that, there’s an attraction neither one of them particularly wants.

Go all the way back to Madam Malkin’s. Their first meeting suddenly matters more. They meet before either knows who the other is, and there could be just the slightest flicker of interest before Harry realizes what kind of person she is. Then they get to Hogwarts, identities fall into place, and whatever possibility existed immediately turns into hostility.

From there, you almost don’t need to manufacture anything. The existing story keeps putting these two people in each other’s orbit.

The Quidditch rivalry becomes charged. The constant insults become a little too personal. Malfoy seems unusually interested in whatever Potter is doing. Harry insists he can’t stand her while nevertheless noticing her every time she walks into a room.

And then you get to Goblet of Fire, where some of the fanfiction versions of this idea have stumbled onto something that actually works remarkably well: Harry somehow gets stuck taking Malfoy to the Yule Ball.

The reason can be almost comically contrived. A magical obligation, a lost bet, McGonagall forcing some inter-house arrangement, whatever. That's hardly outside the operating logic of Harry Potter. The series routinely uses magical rules, school traditions and bizarre circumstances to force characters into situations they would never voluntarily choose.

The important part isn't how you get them there. It's what happens once they're there.

Because now Harry has to spend an entire evening with Malfoy when neither of them can retreat into their normal roles.

For the first time, Harry sees her dressed for a formal occasion instead of wearing Slytherin robes and a sneer. There's that horrible teenage moment of realizing, Oh no. Malfoy is actually beautiful.

And she gets the corresponding realization about him.

They're still antagonistic. They probably spend half the night insulting each other. But eventually they actually talk. Maybe they even have fun for ten minutes before remembering they're supposed to hate each other.

Then Malfoy goes home for Christmas.

And Lucius finds out that his daughter went to the Yule Ball with Harry Potter.

That's where this version could suddenly become much more serious.

Lucius beats her for it.

You wouldn't need to make it melodramatic or turn Draca into a helpless victim. In fact, it works better if Harry doesn't even know immediately. She comes back to Hogwarts acting exactly like Malfoy always acts; arrogant, hostile, determined that nobody see anything underneath.

But Harry notices something is wrong.

Eventually he discovers what happened.

And that would fundamentally alter the way he sees her.

Because Harry understands this.

Maybe better than almost anyone at Hogwarts.

Harry knows what it's like to be a child living in a house where an adult can hurt you and everyone outside that house has no idea. He knows what it's like to dread going home. He knows what it's like to cover up what's happening and then show up at school pretending everything is normal.

And suddenly Harry has to reconcile two apparently contradictory facts:

Malfoy is awful to him.

And Malfoy's father is awful to her.

One doesn't erase the other.

That's much more interesting than simply revealing that she was secretly nice all along. She can still be prejudiced. She can still call Hermione a Mudblood. She can still bully people. Harry can still genuinely dislike enormous parts of who she is.

But now he can't flatten her into Malfoy = bad anymore.

And crucially, she knows that he knows.

Imagine how humiliating that would be for her. Of all people, Potter knows.

So maybe she becomes even nastier toward him afterward.

And Harry can't understand why.

Hermione probably can.

That gives you an emotional thread that can sit quietly underneath the next several books without taking over the story.

Then Half-Blood Prince is where the idea becomes almost absurdly perfect, because the story Rowling already wrote starts behaving like a dark romance without actually being one.

Harry becomes obsessed with Malfoy.

Where is she? What is she doing? Why is she disappearing? What is she hiding?

Everyone else thinks Harry is being ridiculous. Ron could basically spend half the movie going, “Mate, you realize you talk about Malfoy constantly?”

And Harry's answer is completely sincere:

“Because she's a Death Eater!”

Which, of course, she actually is.

That's what makes it work. You don't have to turn her into a misunderstood sweetheart. In fact, doing that would ruin it. She's genuinely involved with something horrifying. Harry's attraction doesn't make his suspicions wrong; it makes the situation worse.

And now the earlier Lucius storyline pays off.

Harry knows what her father is capable of.

So when he realizes Voldemort has given Malfoy an impossible assignment, Harry can understand something the others might miss: this isn't necessarily an honor. It may be another form of punishment directed at the Malfoy family.

Then you get the bathroom scene.

Instead of simply being a brutal confrontation between two enemies, Harry finds the girl he's spent years fighting (and whom he now suspects of being a Death Eater) crying alone in a bathroom.

For once, there's nobody else around.

No Crabbe and Goyle. No Ron and Hermione. No audience.

Just Harry and Malfoy.

And everything explodes.

Harry nearly kills her.

Now imagine him standing there afterward, looking down at her bleeding on the floor.

Because he's seen Malfoy hurt before.

Her father did it.

And now Harry has too.

That realization would absolutely devastate him.

Then the Astronomy Tower takes it further. Harry watches her stand over Dumbledore and realizes she can't do it.

Not because she's secretly been good all along.

Because she's sixteen, terrified, trapped by her family and Voldemort, and discovering that becoming the person she was raised to be is much easier in theory than in reality.

And then you arrive at Malfoy Manor.

That scene barely needs to change at all.

She's asked whether the disfigured prisoner is Harry Potter.

She knows.

Harry knows she knows.

And she says she isn't sure.

That's the moment.

No kiss. No confession. No sudden declaration that she's joining the good guys.

Years earlier, Harry learned what happened to her when Lucius discovered she'd gone to a school dance with Harry Potter.

Now she's standing in Lucius Malfoy's house, surrounded by Death Eaters, with Voldemort potentially one summons away.

All she has to do is say:

“That's Harry Potter.”

And she can't do it.

Harry realizes that Malfoy may have just saved his life.

That also gives Harry saving her during the Battle of Hogwarts much more weight. Neither of them has formally switched sides for the other. They just keep reaching moments where the other person's life is actually in their hands and they can't let them die.

The crucial thing is that I wouldn't actually have them become a couple during the main story. That would make it too neat. Let the war finish first. Let Malfoy remain complicated: proud, damaged, occasionally awful, deeply attached to her family, and forced to reckon with what that family taught her.

Then, after Voldemort is gone, you finally allow all those years of hatred, fascination, attraction, guilt and reluctant respect to become something else.

And suddenly Harry's romantic story isn't something that appears relatively late in the series. It's been quietly developing since the first book.

It even reinforces one of the central ideas of Harry Potter: the family you're born into doesn't have to determine the person you become.

Harry isn't defined by the Dursleys. Sirius isn't defined by the Blacks. And Malfoy doesn't necessarily have to become what Lucius intended his daughter to become.

That's why I think the idea is so compelling. It's not just “Draco would be hotter as a girl” or an enemies-to-lovers gimmick. Changing one variable creates a seven-book romantic arc almost entirely out of material that's already there.

And then, after everything Harry Potter has been through, you get the most ridiculous possible final punchline:

Harry Potter marries a Malfoy.

Which means Lucius Malfoy has to spend the rest of his natural life knowing that the daughter he once beat for going to a school dance with Harry Potter eventually married Harry Potter.

And Harry Potter is now the father of his grandchildren.

Christmas at Malfoy Manor would be spectacular.

[Yuri the Grappler ☦︎ @jurkorolls]

şu videoda Yahudinin parayı hızlı saymasına değil de ceplemesine öyle bi gülüyorum ki her seferinde

[SIMO @simoillust]

“In the end, just as Voldemort was killed for the first time by a love he could never understand, he is slain for the final time by a love he could never extinguish.”

[National Association for Gun Rights @gunrights]

Gun grabbers are never going to be honest or play fair with you.

They hate your guns and want them gone by any means necessary. They'll beg, borrow, rob, threaten, and lie to get there.

Never compromise with them. Never believe them. Never comply.

[@amuse @amuse]

TEXAS SENATE RACE: The DOJ has opened an investigation into James Talarico's PAC and campaign after undercover video caught PAC officials explaining how they pay voters $25 for their votes.

[Jiyong_Meorgiyang🔞 @Mor89432171John]

HARRY THIS IS YOUR 5TH SEXUAL MISDEMEANOR WITH MISS MALFOID AND SNAPE HAS THREATENED TO KILL ME IF I CONTINUE REWARDING HOUSE GRYFFINDOR FOR THIS SO I'LL START DEDUCTING POINTS FROM THE OTHER HOUSES NOW. MINUS 1 BILLION POINTS TO HUFFLEPUFF

[Malfoid Larper @Malfoid_believr]

This is it. It’s time to start the work

I dropped writing at my high school (4 years ago, holy), but I guess it’s time to embrace fanfiction (before I wrote only Original characters)

This will be pure fire writing or pure shit, we’ll see

[Reddit Lies @reddit_lies]

So internet girlies are trying to identify the Cornell 7, but they ended up doxxing the wrong guy because they're not actually real detectives. Now he's receiving death threats for something he didn't do.

They're doing about as well as Reddit did during the Boston Bombing.

[John Doyle @JohnDoyle]

During the summer following 6th grade, one of my friends told me that his older sister had just been basically kidnapped with two of her friends after stupidly accepting a ride from some guy while walking to a beach.

They were taken back to some kind of drug house and forced to do various things. Later they were dropped back off by the beach.

His Dad was going to literally go to the house and kill the guy. My friend endorsed this and said he wasn’t going to feel right again until it happened.

As it would turn out, once men became involved to move beyond the tears and bring about some kind of justice — ranging from police reports to vigilantism — the details of the story would begin to fall apart. Who she was with, where the house was, etc.

Essentially, she would confess that she made the entire thing up to get out of trouble because she’d been caught smoking weed with those friends and was going to be grounded or something.

I don’t remember what ended up happening to her after that, but we’ve talked about it a few times since and both agree that maybe the most insane part is that it just like never got brought up again by anyone, and however trustworthy she was considered by the family prior basically didn’t change.

The moral of the story is that women should suffer severe consequences for this kind of behavior. The reality however is that they won’t, because any popular discussion of “women’s issues” is informed by the sincere conviction that women should never be held accountable for any of their behavior.

[Kangmin Lee | 이강민 @kangminlee]

So it was actually Lucy Craig who raped male Cornell students?

[Kosmo @kasmosd1]

DUMBLEDORE: “You must know why I called you here. Your daughter, Dracaena Malfoid, was terrorizing this boy. She tried to stand near him while he was with people so they would assume they were friends. Yes, this is him. The Boy Who Lived. Your daughter was almost the Girl Who Loved. Almost.”

LUCIUS: “Oh, Albus, you misunderstand completely. None of this was accidental. Every conversation, every suspiciously convenient encounter, every time my daughter happened to appear wherever Potter was standing—those were all carefully arranged.”

DUMBLEDORE: “You planned all of this?”

LUCIUS: “Naturally. Dracaena has been instructed to remain close to Potter, become indispensable to him, earn his trust, and eventually convince him that marrying into the Malfoid family was entirely his own idea.”

HARRY: “WAIT, WHAT?!”

LUCIUS: “Think of the advantages, Potter. You gain the Malfoid name, influence, wealth, connections, and a family that knows precisely how to manipulate the Ministry.”

DUMBLEDORE: “Lucius…”

LUCIUS: “And I gain the Boy Who Lived as my son-in-law. A perfectly respectable arrangement.”

DUMBLEDORE: “You are an extraordinarily careful and evil bastard, Lucius.”

DUMBLEDORE: “1,000 MILLION POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR!”

[Rogal Drorn, Garlic Toast Loyalist @RogalFDorn]

@OTheologicum This implies there were Dark Wizards on the British side during the Battle of New Orleans.
New canon lore.

[End Wokeness @EndWokeness]

AOC claims 7 frat boys "lured a woman into a frat house, drugged, and gang raped her"

Turns out… NONE OF THIS HAPPENED:

> Jane willingly went to the frat house
> willingly had sex, drugs and alcohol
> told police it was 100% consensual
> 2 YEARS LATER, changes her mind

[Oilfield Rando @Oilfield_Rando]

Sure Democrats are trying to kill us all for their cause, but did you hear that a Republican said something mildly racist?!

[Rogal Drorn, Garlic Toast Loyalist @RogalFDorn]

@DocStrangelove2 What’s to bet some guards intentionally fucked it up so she’d live? As in, removed any of the harmful shit.

[Doc Strangelove @DocStrangelove2]

>they gave her the injections
>all she did was go to sleep and snore
>she’s still alive and completely stable

You got be fucking kidding me.

[SL @Steve_Laws_]

She's dead because the government put a Somali refugee next door to her.

Lisa went round to get the Somali to stop terrorising her daughter. She retaliated by attacking Lisa and her sister, so they left and the Somali refugee followed them back and stabbed Lisa in the neck.