Roll Slayers

A 5e D&D podcast where 5 cool ladies (& a jug of mayo) try to save the realm. Action, adventure, & possibly converting to Bahamut await! ON ITUNES NOW

[ENTER THE TWINBRAIN @entertwinbrain]

If a tree falls in the forest, RUN.

https://t.co/r0qmbn8xxV

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

Playing #DnD for four and half hours straight. We’re doing it right. Our #DM also has an artistic side. #dungeonsanddragons #rpg #girlnerds #ladynerds #FriendshipGoals

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

Today’s game day!! Soon there’ll be much crying, arguing, and MAYO!!

Here’s how #RollSlayers keep track of fight order. How about y’all?

#DungeonsAndDragons #dnd #podcast #rpg

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Sorcerer: I roll an #arcana check.
#DM: Ok some of the books feel kinda magical but you find one that looks like it’s wrapped in people skin w/ a mouthful of teeth
S: Hey guys this one looks really weird. What should we-
#Barbarian: READ FROM THAT BOOK OUT LOUD
#dnd #responsible

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Bard *rolls #nat20 to persuade NPC* This guy’s gonna be my best friend. Please don’t take the prisoner.
NPC: It’s a little crowded.
Bard: I understand. Sure. Change of venue? You got a...conference room? Got any power points to show us?
#DM:*sighs*I’ll talk to Donna in HR
#dnd

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Bard: We gotta distract him. We should tell him we need a book. Hey, what was that book you needed?
#Paladin: It was the…entire Babysitter’s Club Series…I’m a huge fan. *Begins explaining the plot of series* At first I liked Stacy but she’s kinda snobby-
#dnd #RollSlayers

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Paladin: I use divine sense
#DM: How wide is that?
P: 60 ft
DM: You sense something bad below you
P: Something below us is bad, guys.
#Bard: *knowing growl* It’s the devil.
DM: Yes, you sensed so hard you feel hell.
P: *happily*Hell’s just 60 ft below us, guys!
#RollSlayers #dnd

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Halfling:*flirts*
#DM: Nothing is said.
H: I drag my finger down his arm.
DM: Nothing happens
H: I squish his face.
DM: It’s hilarious but-
H: I want him to make fish lips.
DM: Okay that happens.
H: I want to roll for FISH LIPS…I rolled a 2
DM: You fail at fish lips
#dnd

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Halfling: Imma flirt with these guards as a distraction. Ms. DM, on a scale of 1-10 how hot are these gnomes?
#DM: One is old and paunchy and one Is younger. Both have dead eyes.
Halfling: Imma go to the paunchy one.
#BecauseReasons #dnd #RollSlayers #rpg

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Bard: ok there’s a door?
#DM: yes there is
Bard: I walk up to it. Does it have a handle?
DM: yes
Bard: ok I grab the handle &push- oh no what if it’s a pull! this could be embarrassing. Is there a sign that says push or pull?
DM: no
Bard: OH NOOO!!!
#reallife #dnd #RollSlayers

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

We’ve got exactly what you need on your boring Thursday: an all girl episode of #DND confronting the imaginary evil... of SOCIAL FAUX PAS!! Also there’s evil evil...if you’re into that kinda thing #RollSlayers #RPG https://t.co/gUGZxfM8M5

[ENTER THE TWINBRAIN @entertwinbrain]

WHY MARVEL SUCKS...on this like one tiny thing https://t.co/KZthZUkfNr

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

WE KNOW WHAT YOU’VE BEEN MISSING AND no we didn’t give it to you...but how about some pop… https://t.co/N53KX7JVwJ

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

NEW EPISODES OF ROLL SLAYERS UP NOW! #RollSlayers #DnD #LadyNerds #PunsAreTheHeightOfHumor https://t.co/bb7jUwWF4N

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

Our dice tower is better than yours! New Roll Slayers episodes this… https://t.co/9CHcFWMoeq

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#DM: The #grell goes to attack Jesrith. He’ll slap-
Jesrith: Wait. I’m on the other side of the room.
DM: So...
Jesrith: So he’s already injured & he’s dragging his bleeding body all the way to me to slap me?!
DM: I randomized who to attack.
Jesrith:...sure.
#dnd #DMIsOutToGetYou

[ENTER THE TWINBRAIN @entertwinbrain]

The lucky 13th episode of #Twinbrain is live!
‘Why’s it lucky?’ No one asks.
Because we have finished the first season of #BuffyTheVampireSlayer!! Don’t listen. We’re weirdos. #podcast #bestfriends https://t.co/p3ivlBR48j

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#DM: The #grell goes to attack you again because he’s sad he missed his quarry.
#Barbarian: His “Cory”?
DM: What?...No...
(Sometime Later)
Barbarian: I attack & scream “YOU WILL WEEP WITH CORY IN HELL!”
DM:There never was a...never mind.
#dnd #BeatingAJokeIntoTheGround

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Halfling: They were too happy. Like they had found a pharmaceutical way to be happy.
#DM: What’s a pharmaceutical?
Halfling:... like they had found a...alchemical? way to be happy.
#DND #WhatAreWordsAnyway #RollSlayers

[Roll Slayers @RollSlayers]

#Paladin: I got D20s if you need it.
#Barbarian: *looks over at dice* Or D-anything.
#Bard: She got all the D’s!
#DM: *hangs head*
#DND #dungeonsanddragons #D20IfYoureNatty #ThisIsHighbrowHumor!!