Urbs Everyday

Thee First. Last. Only Professional Open Mic Comedian

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

I don’t care how long I live in the suburbs. I’ll never respect a grocery store parking lot scooter cop.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

Somebody tell @steveo to tell @danawhite that #ufc234 on @paramount that the thumbnails give away the winners of the fights

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

There should be a service that matches you up with an Erykah Badu type and she speaks straight life into your bum ass existence

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

@EASPORTSFC can we get a fix for my entire team playing keeper in seasons???

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

A cold bowl of cereal is the certification stamp on a great night.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

Spanish McGregor #UFC308

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

Kinda rude there’s no place I can get a quick lap dance before work in the morning.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

The amount of stab wound strippers and cocaine that’s about to get tossed into the ocean is going to be unreal.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

I be tryin to make jokes on here but there’s so much tittie meat. I get distr..

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

At this point I don’t know if I’m doing comedy to sell merch or selling merch to do comedy.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

Some of y’all wouldn’t recognize the comedic spirit even if it came on your face.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

You: Heard your cashapp ding.

Me: Patiently waiting to hear what a good boy I’ve been lately.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

I know I’m a degenerate cuz when Fat Bottomed Girls comes on in the cafeteria at my Uber professional job I sing a little bit of the chorus.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

You nasty for pulling it apart like that.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

You ever heard somebody sneeze from the privacy of their own house? Some of the most violent shit ever.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

I really be tryin to write jokes and entertain y’all but it’s too much titties on this app. This is praise. Not a complaint.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

2024: Does anyone know if she makes VR content?

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

If you ever see a cat in the strip club parking lot then you’re in the right place. Enjoy that lap dance buddy.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

I can’t stop I’m Dough Boy mixed with the Cheddar. I won’t stop. Dick shot. Stomach punch for that leather.
Rhyme Dailey.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

As a member of the biracial delegation I have to let me fellow black people know. My fellow white people are onto something with the heavy edible use and country music combo.

[Urbs Everyday @RomeDailey]

Don’t approach me asking for spare change. Approach me and ask for snack money. A dime has never changed my circumstance but I know what it’s like to ‘just need a snack’ real real bad.