Ronnie Fleming

veteran pass rusher

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Oh you want to be a comedian? I hope you like the feeling of throwing a birthday party every single week and worrying if anyone is going to show up.

[Dave Warmier @Causey4]

@Ron_Flem I still have this

[whitecotton @whitecotton]

Always a good sign for a society when people have to start conversations with sentences like “Personally, I believe murder is a bad thing..”

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

@Hatr8787 They were on at different times.

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Swamp-ass just hits different when you got a bbl.

[RatedHComedy @ratedhcomedy]

@Ron_Flem 😂😂😂 This is great!

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Liver King did nothing wrong.

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Now that Texas banned weed and porn Americans are fleeing to Mexico for a better life.

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Changing a bunch of tires last week made me think about our dads and how they just knew that shit (I had to YouTube). Maybe that’s why they were so quiet, they had to retain all this information. “I’d say I’m proud of you son but I’m afraid I’ll forget how long to boil an egg.”

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

JD Vance gotta write a Hillbilly Eulogy.

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Saw a Men’s Health headline: “How this Married Dad got Supremely Fit at 45.” If I see a married dad get supremely fit at 45, I’m not thinking that man is healthy I think he’s having an affair.

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Just want to live long enough my COD will be Suicide by Robocop.

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

New PornHub category no one asked for

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

If you’re a fish, Lent is your yearly holocaust

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Me, watching the West Wing: “More like the ‘Left’ Wing amiright?” *goes for high-five/hug from my dad that never comes*

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Saw Love Lies Bleeding and now I know what i must do (grow out my hair like this.)

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Women will be like “girl lunch” and it’s vodka

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Was the subtext of Annie that no one wants a redhead?

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Masturbating in your 20s: I needed that.
Masturbating in your 30s: I needed *that*

[Ronnie Fleming @Ron_Flem]

Being a man is worrying your friend in the hospital will call you gay if you ask if he’s okay.