HeathFranklinChopper

Comedian. Wearer of Moustache.
New 2026 tour on sale now

🎟

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

👊 That's GOLD! 2026 will mark 20 years since I first toured. Catch two decades of my funniest bits and hardest hits, from The Ronnie Johns Half Hour to today, including The Weather, HTFU Australia, Bunnings + more GOLD. This isn’t just another show. It’s a comedy heist!
#chopper

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

What sort of wanker has a milestone and covers himself with gold? In unrelated news, debuting my 20th anniversary gold polo this week in Brisbane. @BrisComedyFest
#gold #chopper #sp433 #pendlebury #20years #scott433 #pendles #heathfranklinschopper

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

Using the phrase ‘Living rent free in your head’ is such a perfect and reliable indicator that someone is a stupid annoying xunt. It’s the catchphrase for people who take pride in being irritating.

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

Because they’re shit animals and everyone who owns a cat is pretending they aren’t in an abusive relationship with it.

[Cats with Aura 😺 @catwithaura]

Why do cats do this 😭

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

Why did Jesus specifically hate bottle shops so much?

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

💍MAFS HTFU! Who is watching this shit? Well I did. I watched it so you didnt have to. You're welcome. Here's my review of Married At First Shite #marriedatfirstsight #mafs #chopper #comedy #mafsau #heathfranklinschopper #dinnerparty

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

🎅🌹👃🍒🫑 T'was the Night Before Xmas. Recorded on TV's The Ronnie Johns Half Hour in 2005. 20 years ago! You get less for murder! Have a cracking break, legends. Merry Fistmas, everybody! 🎟New 2026 tour on sale now
#christmas #ronniejohnshalfhour #chopper #merrychristmas #xmas

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

📣 Get ready for big tour news. The Hardenberg is coming to a town near you in 2026!

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

🤜❤️🍫 Buckle up lovers, I'm reviewing Valentine's Day.
On tour, next cities: @AvalonBeachSLSC @ClubhouseComedy @freshcomedytas @TheGardenofUD
#valentinesday #love #chocolate
#standup #heathfranklin #vday #funny #heathfranklinschopper #chopper

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

💍📺 Married at First Sight? Who watches this sh*t? I did. And this is my review. Harden the f**k up, MAFS!
#MAFS #mafsaustralia #MAFSAU #marriedatfirstsight #chopper #comedy #standup #heathfranklin #funny #straya

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

😢🍷🍻 Are you sober-curious? Have you heard of these people?
#chopper #comedy #standup #heathfranklin #funny #beer #sober #sobercurious #soberliving #sobercuriousmovement #sobercuriousity #soberlife #alcohol #nonalcoholic #wine #gin

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

Everyone wants to murder billionaires... until you mention Taylor Swift.

#taylorswift #taylornation #taytay

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

📣 TOUR ANNOUNCEMENT!
Time to hit the road in 2025 with a brand new show before it's too late. Civilisation is on it last legs. Who will save us from the Softcockalypse? One man....the last hard bastard on Earth. OZ on sale now. More cities to come.

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

🐴🏇Melbourne Cup? Oh, it's cruel to horses...no it's not!
🎟 Giddy up! I'm heading to Melbourne this week for shows at @TheComicsLounge and Sooki Lounge. Then QLD next week.
#chopper #melbourne #melbournecup #horseracing #raceday #jockeys #NupToTheCup #heathfranklin #straya

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

Patrick Cripps, best on ground so far. On track for first Norm Smith #AFLSwansLions #AFLGF #Swans #lions #normsmith #cripps #katyperry

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

Big game hunting.

#comedy #biggame #hunting #chopper #htfu #hardenup #shooting #huntingseason #Hunter

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

Some clown wants to cancel Father's Day? Not on my watch, sunshine.

Tag your old man, or any rad dads and show lil Antony McWhingeFace how we do Father's day!
#fathersday #fathers #raddads #chopper #spiders #comedy #heathfranklin #sharkweek #australiaday #stepdad #dadbod

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

🚫👉👌🕷 More OZ tour dates announced. Tix info in bio

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

With speeches like this, Biden should really run for president #DNC2024 #biden

[HeathFranklinChopper @RonnJohnChopper]

@Morgan_T_Brown @JasmineQuilter Only posted it to Facebook. And theft doesnt work like that.