Sorry, but a partner who ruins your mental health cannot be the love of your life. Ever. I know you love them. I know you've built a future in your mind with them. I know you keep hoping they’ll change, that things will get better, that the good moments will eventually outweigh the bad.
But here's the truth you need to hear: real love doesn't destroy you. Real love doesn't leave you anxious, depressed, constantly questioning yourself, walking on eggshells, or losing pieces of who you are. That's not love, that's trauma bonding.
No disrespect to anyone, but God please don't send me another partner who doesn't know how to communicate, take accountability, or emotionally show up. I don't want a partner who's still battling their own issues, avoiding healing, depressed, or emotionally unavailable and refusing help. I don't want a partner who can't stand firm, speak with clarity, or take control of their own life.
I want someone to choose me. To be all in. I want someone to share their fears with me, their victories, their hopes and dreams. I want a genuine, slow, soft love. I want to grow with them. I want them to want “us” as badly as I do.
i want my man to be gentle with me, talk to me kindly, show understanding, and have grace. That’s how I communicate. This macho, tough guy, mean man shit doesn’t even remotely interest me. Talk to me nice or not at all.