Ryan

Beware! Twitter virgin!

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

Goodnight. I hate you.

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

Fuck you Adobe! I spend more time downloading Adobe updates than I've ever spent using Adobe.

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

So 3 months after joining twitter, it finally lets me confirm my account.

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

@deadairdevil Oh no honey, don't feel bad. What's the matter?

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

How much longer do you guys think Renée Zellweger can hold in that fart?

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

@dylanvanholt Weirdo

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

Rolled over on the morning wood today and like a pole vaulter it launched me across the room. I stuck the landing. The dog high fived me.

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

RT ''@DeadAirDevil Believe it or not, I'm not drunk right now.'' Believe it or not, I don't believe that.

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

Ever see that episode of South Park where everything Stan hears sounds like someone shitting? That's what 1 Direction sounds like to me.

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

Is it wrong that I wish Peter Griffin was my dad?

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

@TessaIn2D Cute

[Ryan @RyanVanHolt]

Hmmm, every email link twitter sends me to verify this account is apparently invalid. What gives?