Riley

[Johnny Sack @spiritbluelover]

Someone’s intern is lost in the blue line

[red whine supernova 🌟 @sarahndipity18]

once my nervous system figures out the difference between waiting for a text back & being hunted for sport it's over for you hoes

[Riley @ryemckenna]

Embracing my inner Candace Flynn

[hope hopes hoping @hopes_revenge]

a girl i had sex with three times 8 years ago texted me on my birthday but my two closest male friends didn’t . it’s just like that

[claire @clairelzbeth]

anthony bourdain is like catnip for women because he understood that the fastest way to seem interesting is to be interested

[HowlingKanye @HowlingKanye]

When I clean my apartment before a date I feel like a corrupt mayor hiding documents ahead of an audit.

[emz! @blahblahemilyy]

it’s not until the 5th date that i’m even confident that I know what the man looks like

[Alexis @aleozimok]

how to find nyc apartment without experiencing immense suffering

[claire @claireyael]

Taylor Swift wrote Cornelia Street about the one in Ridgewood

[Louise 🔸 (in Berkeley 7/22-8/12) @LeRoyDesCimes]

when i email americans i always put more exclamation points, out of respect for their culture

[༺ 𝑰𝒗𝒚 𝑹𝒆𝒏𝒆̀𝒆 ༻ @cemeteryfaerie]

Protecting your whimsy includes knowing when to be a bitch

[lauren @laurenashastro]

cancers have the success everyone attributes to capricorns

[Riley @ryemckenna]

A good banter solves everything

[Riley @ryemckenna]

Shockingly, I have decided not to bring my vs bombshell bra with me to nyc

[jan levinson @janlevinson69]

Guy who needs to take adderall to work at Deloitte

[gremlin @queerlilgremlin]

“almost four” sure sounds like he doesn’t consider the fetus she’s pregnant with to be a real person yet

weird

[shy @zacyino]

they finna let the animals out the Bronx zoo tonight

[philip matarese @philorphilip]

Heard two little kids say "we'll remember this for the rest of our LIVES" in brooklyn last night

[Riley @ryemckenna]

I only get a pine nut off the hummus if I really deserve it

[duda @dudaisms]

jfk jr so fine just now i realized he was wearing a polka dots tie in those grad pics