Ryan Gorman ❼

NCSU Alum | RDU➡️CLT | 5’7 If I Keep My Back Straight

[Ryan Gorman ❼ @RyGorm]

Girl buss that thang open like a science fair tri-fold

[High Yield Harry @HighyieldHarry]

55 Saratoga Waters, 55 Bananas, 55 Bags of Ice

[gio @_GioHub]

not to trauma dump or anything but during the boston tea party, i was actually thrown into the boston harbor because they thought my body was tea. it was really scary. i almost drowned.

[Just T.J. the Army Vet @thomas_garrard]

I just heard a sentence that completely wrecked me. “One day you will bury your father. On that day, you will realize that you lost the only man that wanted to see you do better than him.” My dad left me with one instruction. Take care of my mom. The love of his life. He left this world hoping he had raised enough of a man to do that. I have kept my vow to my dad, even on days that I feel I fail him. Dads are so important. I miss mine.

[Carlton @CrispyCarlton]

Have it on good authority the Falcons are going to do something stupid soon

[Ana @wavelettes]

signals an intelligence which can’t be faked.

you can use all the technical jargon and namedrop philosophers all you want; none of that will showcase your authentic pattern recognition and cognitive flexibility quite like telling a contextual and well-timed jokey joke

[Barstool Pack @BarstoolPack]

Never forget what they took from us

[Cooper Lawrence @CooperLawrence]

Just went to the Oreo website and hit “accept all cookies” … and now we wait

[Jonathan “John” Cox Jr. @JohnCox2324]

Free Coke zeros if you get a DUI btw

[riley ⋆ ݁𖥔 ˖ @lilcatpuke]

when u gonna stop drinking cokes with the wokes and come drink some dr.pepper w a big stepper

[pratham @prath4m]

if my wife stabbed me id thrust myself deeper into the blade just to be a few inches closer to her but thats just me idk

[crust bucket @eeeosburn]

If ur not drinking 13 beers with me I can only assume ur drinking 13 beers against me

[Vivian @suchnerve]

Violence is NOT the answer. The answer is *opens history book*

uh oh

*frantically starts flipping through pages*

uh oh. oh no. no no no. uh oh

[Josh Ellis @jzellis]

OK, let me solve American "economic anxiety" very quickly. I'm gonna sort it out for you in less than ten tweets and then you won't have that excuse anymore. You ready? Here goes.

The cause is capitalism and greed. That's it. Nothing else. Just that.

[Ravens Realest 🐦‍⬛ @Ravens_Realest]

Get clamped kiddo. Back to the drawing board.

[hannah jones @hannahjonescool]

Cannot get over the fact that I am a member of the only generation that will ever experience the eight year window when the internet both contained pretty much all knowledge AND it was easy to find and generally reliable. And it was my exact high school and college years.

[B-Wall @BWall]

🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭 #HereWeGo

[angry buni 🤬 @theangriestbuni]

A six week abortion ban is actually a 4 week abortion ban and if you don’t understand this then you probably should keep women’s reproductive rights out your fucking mouth.

[Jon Bois @jon_bois]

the nfl should revert the the afc and nfc to three divisions each (east, central, west) and create a third eight-team conference called the goofy guys. the bears, falcons, panthers, commanders, jets, browns, jags, and raiders are the goofy guys. they get six playoff berths