Sloth

Heaven is a place where you get two for one milkshakes on Tuesdays and the dog shit smells like strawberries.

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

PictureThis - Instantly identify your plants.
https://t.co/IRcmnibxyC

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

😂

[Andrew Cotter @MrAndrewCotter]

This is how we have spent most of the last few months and pretty much how it was written. The end result is ‘Olive, Mabel & Me’, available for order from all the usual places here: https://t.co/DfhxRfqGCd
And here: https://t.co/8T3I5bitFC

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

@MattHancock must dread going on the @BBC I'm not a left or a right, before anyone starts. It must say on his schedule "bbc interview" he must roll his eyes and think "for f£&k sake" 😂😂😂

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

@mfhorne just read about you graduating after 19 years 👍🏼😂 Brilliant, congratulations Doctor Horne 😉 ✌🏼

[Liam Gallagher @liamgallagher]

My name is liam Gallagher I have 4 beautiful children I have dabbled in drugs over the years I’ve had many number 1s now send me the keys to no10 I’ll sort this pile of shit out WHY ME?WHY NOT.

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

@liamgallagher Why the hell not, I think if you ran for it you'd get it tbh. Can't be no worse than the shower of shite we've got at the minute 😀✌🏼

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

Watching #PhoenixNights 🤣

[A Letter for A House @LetterForAHouse]

Last week I didn’t get the chance to post pictures of 🐌mail

❤️Also please everyone visit our website to see how helpful & informative it has become after it’s facelift ❤️

https://t.co/ZJmeQjMbzE

❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

@LetterForAHouse I'm so sad that I am not going to be able to be part of the conversation! Unfortunately its in the middle of the night here in the UK 😔

[Max and Paddy Quotes @maxandpaddyline]

The court calls Mr Potter's first character witness; Mr Kenny Dalglish Senior.

'Dalglish?'

'DALGLISH?'

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

Now don't get me wrong @gordonsmart is ok but I do miss @Johnnyvaughan when he's off 🙄 @RadioX

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

@missyfaitken I remember when ten of us went to Tenerife (Inc Adela's son) he was far to big for a stroller at the time but we took one and when we all went out for drinks and food he came with us 😂 I remember now the lads carrying the stroller down steps 😂😂

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

@rickygervais He was three when I rescued him, he's been in my life for eight years..... I know he won't always been in my life but he will always be in my heart. #dogsareawesome #dogsarefamily #dogsarebetterthanpeople

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

Just seen this on the @RadioX Insta! 👌🏼😂 Looking good @rickygervais

[Mark G Smith @marksmithstuff]

Crucial to remember Michael Jackson also denied having any plastic surgery

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

Watched the AfterLife series on Netflix honestly it's easily the best thing @rickygervais has ever written. 👌🏼❤️

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

If your sitting in your living room at night with the big light on, you need to turn it off and put a lamp on #ambience

[Ricky Gervais @rickygervais]

Be the person your dog thinks you are.

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

@stevecoogan65 is this a genuine Twitter profile or a fan page?

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

@PheJodie @HEYDUGGEE Me too! Stick, stick, stick, stick, stick stickie, stickie, stick stick!

[Sloth @saddestsmile]

That moment when you realise you've been watching @HEYDUGGEE for the past ten minutes even though the baby has fallen asleep 😂