𝓘𝓭𝓲𝓸𝓽 ♡

i ♡ my bf, animal crossing owns my ass, 26

[¿ @umlarp]

putting in my too weak notice

[alexSSN @alexSSN]

Hey man, that’s really awesome that you saved some of your 4th of July fireworks so you could set them off at noon on the 13th of July

[╰✦ daza¡ 🕊️ @dazaichu_]

I truly caught myself thinking "what is it called when you get both the summer downs and the winter blues" and then it hit me that I think it is just called depression.

[︎︎ s @saeioura]

i could never be a gambler i just spent money on pastries that weren’t even that good and my chest started to hurt

[jár @jarodzsz]

observing twitter discourse when you have a working brain and actually interact with real humans on a daily basis

[zu 🥨 free range deranged @raccoon_dad]

a bee is a reasonable insect. it flies into your house and spends the entire time it's inside trying to get out. a fly is an abomination. the second it gets inside your house it moves right in. straight to the living room. like its been an indoor animal its whole life. disgrace

[ruby @emophringe]

dan and phil conspiracy list except it’s only the ones they have confirmed are true:

-they are gay for each other
-they kissed during the 1st phil is not on fire
-they shared the tatinof tour bus bed
-they share(d) clothes/underwear
-they had a fake apartment

[Amanda Killian @eroscestlavie_x]

i kinda get why women who are tiny and short act like that because I just tried to imagine a world where I was 5’1” and got pissed off immediately

[SOLACE @V4MPF4NGZ101]

everyone should have a priv where they get to be perverted and evil i think. its good for the soul

[swinky @swinkying]

i don’t get how people are casual cat owners like my cats are the Only reason i haven’t killed mtself they’re my pride and Joy

[Shane @Mountain_Twhick]

It’s always nice when a Bisexual is a gay guy that’s also into chicks and not a straight guy that’s also into dudes

[Trixie Mattel™ @trixiemattel]

tired of being the only one who is hot and sexy.

[𝒢𝒾𝓁𝒷ℯ𝓇𝓉 @AbakpaJob]

the perfect number of cats is two stupid cats. preferably siblings. but they can't both be the same type of stupid. one needs to be stupid (dumb) and one needs to be stupid (annoying)

[𝓐 ⭑ @ayojoestar]

Love when cats do that thing where they slam their little bodies on the ground and show their belly cause they’re excited to see you

[Kathleen @tmszhjh88]

This perspective is just too powerful

[ೀ fafa @fashionpixie_]

one earring, tan line, showing hole, #okay

[* @ghettog0thh]

how it feels being in your 20’s and asking yo family for shit

[justina @justtjustinaa]

I’ll never say I’m no better than a man cus I am!! When I look at women with lust it’s okay cus im pure of heart!! A bit turned on but pure of heart nonetheless