saige

when i do tweet im hilarious

[saige @saigethesage]

the path is treacherous but we stay silly

[saige @saigethesage]

forget lab-grown! the latest in ethical low-carbon diamond forging technology is - my sinuses! 💎

[saige @saigethesage]

because it’s a cowboy hat for cats it’s legally a catboy hat

[saige @saigethesage]

i’ve never had a back of the neck accessory before!!!

[saige @saigethesage]

perchance sometimes on occassion my mental checklist isn’t quite as effective as a written one

[saige @saigethesage]

yelling “BINGOOO!!!” when i ***

[saige @saigethesage]

it’s not pride until you get squirted in

[saige @saigethesage]

ive never been the reason for the wet floor sign before 🥰

[saige @saigethesage]

*describing a book*
the climax is better than any orgasm i’ve ever had

[saige @saigethesage]

“maybe Meow can be our always”

[saige @saigethesage]

matching pitch more like meowching pitch

[saige @saigethesage]

“he’s so urethral”

[saige @saigethesage]

hozier live is so fucking good, im the wettest ive been all weekend

[saige @saigethesage]

“a hoe does get sunburned”

[they/them fistbump @HORRORGENRES]

A FULL SMOSHxDIRTY LAUNDRY LINEUP NOBODY MOVE. NOBODY MOVEEEE

[JP @jpbrammer]

things “Laughing Kamala” also kind of sounds like
• Dark Souls boss
• healthy popcorn brand (Whole Foods)
• uncommon bird
• forbidden martial arts technique
• medieval blade of legend

[🌈beth🌞 @alexissroses]

hanging w friends healed me? incredible concept.

[saige @saigethesage]

the crane wives said sapphic and ottawa said yes

[Andre 🗡️ @ONwithDRE]

I guess nobody said meatloaf

[saige @saigethesage]

people love to criticize my shortcomings but just because i dont come long doesn’t mean i dont come good

[saige @saigethesage]

@smolvampir3 did you get your salary info 👀