Salmaan Carrim

Dr Dre's dead he's locked in my basement haha..... IG - @salmau5

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

Lol @mitchell_hughes #INFO2000

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

@Javastatus lol bra send me your whatsapp number

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

@Javastatus lol call leslie lmao hahaha..

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

Cooked 2 minute noodles in 1 minute 33 seconds today. Fuck you school teachers who said I wouldn't amount to anything

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

@Thaakzberk lol if I had to choose between you and James Franco,I would be thinking about what id be doing with James Franco later that day.

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

Lol I wish I had a friend like James Franco

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

@Imi_Hassan happy birthday to the lil homey lol

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

Muslims - folding their pants above the ankles before it was cool

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

Babies smell so fucking nice..

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

"There is no worse feeling than a broken heart"....... lol try a blocked nose..

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

If my surname was kara I would walk around with a speaker and play cara cara every time I walked into a room

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

I ate a paper saying "in a relationship with you" because you are what you eat

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

New earphones new me

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

These mosquitos are fucking hatching or whatever it is they do. They're everywhere.

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

"@Sha_HERO_Jada: Why would anyone name their child Acad?" Lets ask a professional in this field @Acidins

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

Coldplay - Magic

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

Its like Indian mothers want you to get hurt so they can capitalise on medical aid.

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

@Ya_a_seen_Him ...aldough there's always pancakes. .

[Salmaan Carrim @salmau5]

Everybody wants loads of friends. Nobody wants to be friendly.