a chip off the line

A sprite! A grumpy grungy hobgoblin sprite! (she/her)

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

@NYSDEC seen in delmar ny, why does this deer look so weird?

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

i’ve been trying to come up with a nice way to say that liking stand up comedy is a red flag, but i can’t. and if you don’t have anything nice to say you shouldn’t say anything at all!!

[Color Schemer @colorschemer]

untasteful dark cream
paragogic rust
meteoric baby blue

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

@apostrophebeats i think the beauty of it is that it can be any of those things and more. truly an all purpose term

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

just watched hellraiser for the first time. i really liked the cenobites- it sounds just like they are saying CINNAbites, and it really kept me from getting scared thinking about the creatures as nothing more than yummy little cinnamon bites :)

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

@aekallwine juicy juice grape juice literally tastes better than any other grape juice omg i always was insisting there was a clear difference😭

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

i’ve never seen this show before tonight and i know nothing about it so if this is a popular opinion and i’m stating the obvious then leave me alone but i only like george and elaine

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

seinfeld would be better if there was no seinfeld at all and george was the star

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

boomers may suck mostly but you gotta admit they have the wildest stories. they’ll be like “once i got pushed down a flight of stairs at a party and broke my leg but wouldn’t ya know it- i never let go of my beer, dammit! 🤣🤣”

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

that’s the last time i tell someone they can tell me anything that’s for certain

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

girls be like “girl talk!!! 👄 💄 👠 “ then talk about their prolapsed vagina

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

i wish god was real so i could beat his dumb ass up!!!!

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

sorry but almond milk is honestly stupid and useless too

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

how are people still going to TANNING SALONS in 2021 . seriously? tanning?!!?? why does that still exist

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

it’s hilarious that my cat even grooms herself. smooth that fur down all you want little honey i’m just gonna mess it up when i scratch and smooch the bejeezus outta ya right after!!!! she never learns

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

naw she’s just listening to aphex twin

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

i want to watch this new show every one is talking about “squid game”. but only if it’s a nature show about little squids playing little undersea games with each other. otherwise why call it that, that would be so stupid. fingers crossed i’m not disappointed

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

starting a new facebook called facebook 2 and it will just be a live stream of me staring at a tree and transcending the human experience via the incredibly enriching world of nature

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

@I_hate_alexsei yerp

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

colorado be like “ah yes, you’d like to take a walk in the woods? that’ll be $500 and you’ll also have to park 2 miles away bc the parking lot is already full of rich white yuppies here to take their expensive purebred dogs for a walk🥰”

[a chip off the line @samgiffxrd]

when u come to colorado to be outside but u can’t even be outside bc literally everything is swarming with people and also costs $20