Samantha

NMP 10.28 💕👼🏼 Kodah Rhys 6.18.23 💗

[Samantha @sami_komives]

My absolute favs from the @machinegunkelly concert last night 💗🖤

[Samantha @sami_komives]

Cutest lil D-Backs fan!

#dbacks #whatafan

[blonde don @machinegunkelly]

lonely road, take me home

[No Lie with Brian Tyler Cohen @NoLieWithBTC]

Alabama just ruled that frozen, unimplanted embryos are people.

This petri dish is now more protected under law by Republicans than Alabama schoolchildren.

[Satan @s8n]

stop being a dumb bitch

[trash jones @jzux]

how do i not go back to work next week without quitting my job

[itsallphoenix @itsallphoenix2]

Ladies and gentlemen I introduce to you the “Gilbert Goons”

[Arizona Diamondbacks @Dbacks]

A lot of people are awfully quiet right now… 😶

[Jeff Tiedrich @itsJeffTiedrich]

listen up, stupids:
you told us Joe Biden was corrupt. ok, we said, show us your evidence.
you told us you had proof. cool, we said, show us your evidence.
there's a whistleblower, you screamed. great, we said, show us your evidence.
the whistleblower has tapes, you shouted. awesome, we said, show us your evidence.
then you told us your whistleblower was in hiding. fine, we said, show us your evidence.
then you told us you couldn't find your whistleblower.
super, we said, show us your evidence. then you told us the whistleblower was dead.
whatever, we said. just show us the fucking evidence.
then it turned our your whistleblower was a Chinese spy and a fugitive from justice. great whistleblower you got there, we said, now how about that evidence.
then you announced an impeachment hearing. why, we asked, did you finally find some evidence?
Professor Turley's going to tell you all about it, you replied. cool, we said, Professor Turley, do you HAVE any evidence?
no, said Professor Turley. well then, we asked, did you SEE any evidence?
no, said Professor Turley. well then, we asked, did you HEAR ABOUT any evidence?
no, said Professor Turley. and so your big stupid impeachment hearing blew the fuck up right in your dumb faces, and you all looked like silly dipshits.
even Fox News made fun of you.
now it's time for you to sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up until you can show. us. some. evidence

[Samantha @sami_komives]

Here Twitter, enjoy these pics of my little man 🥹

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

trump mugshot and pumpkin spice latte released tomorrow. an early autumn barbenheimer of sorts

[Futuristic™ @OnlyFuturistic]

Cigarettes are gross, they will never not be gross. If u smoke cigarettes do that shit far away from me lol

[Thomas Sanders @ThomasSanders]

I do not need men. Only garlic bread.

[Hank Green @hankgreen]

Ohhh, I can block the Twitter Blue reply guys all at once...they're always right at the top.

Hey! Hey...trans women are women! Climate change is caused by people! Healthcare is a human right! Birth control should be free and abortion should be legal!

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Because nothing says “innocent” like threatening a judge’s family

[Ana Navarro-Cárdenas @ananavarro]

Drag Shows don’t kill kids.
Books don’t kill kids.
Green m&m’s don’t kill kids.
Big Bird doesn’t kill kids.
AP courses, don’t kill kids.
Learning history, doesn’t kill kids.
Dolly Parton’s & Miley Cyrus rainbow song, doesn’t kill kids.

Fucking guns are the #1 killer of kids.

[Jo @JoJoFromJerz]

I’m not dressed in a Biden Snuggie, wearing a Biden cowboy hat, Biden chaps or using a Biden beer koozie. I’m not waving a California King-sized Biden flag, and I do not have Biden’s face painted anywhere on myself or on my car.
And I am not spending my Saturday morning waiting out in the middle of some freezing cold Texas field on the anniversary of a deadly cult compound siege in order to hear Biden tell me (again) about how the 2020 election was stolen from him.
I’m not doing any of that shit, because I’m not a fucking idiot and I’m not in a cult.

[Nina Turner @ninaturner]

I don’t care if someone works at Burger King, Walmart, Dollar General—anywhere. If someone is working full time, there is no reason their paycheck shouldn’t cover food & rent.

This shouldn’t be controversial.

[teryn @youngtiddy]

microdosing Hell by going to work