samuel isadore

don't hurt my feelings

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

if god wanted me to go on a diet, he wouldn't have made my mouth the exact shape of all food

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@ggarciaroberts i have a story you might be interested in. let’s just say sammy soda’s bat has something “corky” in it (cork). email me.

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@GraceParra360 i wanted hanggliding

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

the first rule of fight club is fight. the second rule of fight club is... club?

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@oldfriend99 smh

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

cant find extra sharp q-tips anywhere

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@rylandrabarista my culture considers this good luck

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

it feels like months since I’ve played simon says

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

cant believe that motherfucker from verizon went to sprint

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@timjacobwise You are intentionally antagonizing one group of people and unintentionally antagonizing a (much larger) group that doesn’t fit the description.

What exactly is your point that’s being proven?

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

Let People Be Corny

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@willmenaker @jonlovett If you want to see the influence you have, just look at all the replies of people who somehow believe you made a good point

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@nona https://t.co/dPTCQU9wVs

[The Hollywood Reporter @THR]

Rick Moranis is set to appear in Disney's upcoming reboot of 'Honey, I Shrunk the Kids' https://t.co/GMrwdui7MK

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@nona Just constantly tweeting about him

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@joef233 Feels so weird I don’t know if this is true

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@MatSposta @dereksiskin my home is overrun by spiders

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@MatSposta @dereksiskin i'm not

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@oldfriend99 seriously or practically?

[samuel isadore @samuel_isadore]

@oldfriend99 What is “it”