Parabird

sleep with one eye open

[Covie @covie_93]

.....unless you are an ICE agent.

[Parabird @saphexall]

@falloutplays @DattosDestiny Just monkey business.

[Democrats @TheDemocrats]

@StephenM shut up you ugly fuck

[wa$abi nut$ @bawitdabababe]

rip kristi noem. i’ll put down some dogs in your honor tonight

[Xianyang City Bureaucrat @XianyangCB]

1. Incapable of reproduction
2. Extreme body modification required for career
3. Can end bureaucratic careers with a catty remark

Is 2026 the Year of the Court Eunuch?

[Governor Newsom Press Office @GovPressOffice]

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE, ESPECIALLY THE DEEPLY DISTURBED LOSERS SUFFERING FROM EXTREME NEWSOM DERANGEMENT SYNDROME (“NDS”). DOCTORS SAY IT’S CURABLE, VERY EASY TREATMENT, BUT THEY REFUSE IT BECAUSE THEY LIKE BEING “MISERABLE.” OH WELL! SPEAKING OF LOSERS, I HOPE DONALD TRUMP HAS THE 2026 “HE DESERVES” AFTER UNLEASHING CHAOS ON THE PEOPLE OF THIS GREAT COUNTRY THIS YEAR. WE WILL NEVER FORGIVE HIM FOR MARCHING SOLDIERS INTO OUR BEAUTIFUL CITIES, RAISING TAXES SO HE CAN GIVE YOUR MONEY TO HIS RICH FRIENDS, HIS STUPID TARIFFS, RIPPING BABIES AWAY FROM THEIR MOTHERS, THROWING GRANDMAS OFF THEIR HEALTHCARE, PROMISING AID FOR THE PEOPLE OF LOS ANGELES TO REBUILD HOMES AND THEN VANISHING. HE IS A TOTAL FRAUD, TOTAL COWARD, AND TOTAL LOSER! THERE IS A VERY SPECIAL PLACE WAITING FOR HIM (EVERYONE KNOWS WHERE) AND IT’S NOT MAR-A-LAGO! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER. — GCN

[Sage (they/them) @Squaredash1]

With this incredible, state of the art technology, we can finally almost make a crappy recreation of a video game that came out almost 30 years ago

[Sacho @ksm6971]

USPS M1A1

[corb @awshuqs]

is ChatGPT down for anyone else? i’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery

[Gunner Rivers’ Burner @packfan2005]

Beach milk. #primal

[Clint Stevens @clintstevensTV]

I wish i could deafen on discord without muting. That way I could eat my chips into the mic without having to hear everyone complain about it