Jesus, Take the Wheel
This evening I got into my car for a quick run to the supermarket. Pressed the start button , or so I believed, and spent the next thirty seconds locked in a battle with my car. Something was immediately off as the steering wheel felt very stiff and wouldn’t budge. I pressed the accelerator with the impatience of a man who has places to be. Nothing. The car screeched loudly but did not move.
I sighed, gave up, and rest my head against the wheel, frustrated that the engine was faulty and I would have to call my mechanic Mr Musibau who probably has my name saved as “God sent” on his phone— and that's when my eyes drifted to the gearbox.
Park. The car was still in park?! Ugh
It had never properly started. There was nothing wrong with the engine. The only malfunction in that vehicle was me I guess.
I laughed at myself for a good moment, shifted to drive, and rolled off to buy my groceries.
The lesson of this seemingly trivial event followed me down the road….
You cannot steer a parked car. No matter how hard you try.
I say "Jesus, take the wheel" a lot. Sometimes as a joke, other times because I'm genuinely overwhelmed by the size of an idea living rent-free in my head. I'm a dreamer, and the beautiful thing about dreaming your way through the world is that you see possibilities clearly in your mind long before they collide with reality. The trouble is that the magnitude of what you see can overwhelm you so completely that you never begin.
So you sit still, thinking about direction, timing, the perfect plan, the right path, the myth clarity at the very beginning
Meanwhile, the car is still in park.
Physics explains that an object at rest stays at rest. And I suspect much of life obeys the same principle. We wait endlessly to know which direction to go before we move, without realizing that moving is the very thing that reveals direction. Once the car is in motion, you can steer. Turn left. Turn right. Slow down. Reverse. You can even turn around completely and take another road altogether.
But none of those choices are available to you while parked.
I know that starting is hard. Beginning anything new and the discovery of what we are truly capable of, comes with a resistance that feels almost physical, like the world itself is testing whether you mean it.
And I say this as someone who struggles so much with this. Maybe that’s why this small debacle in my car today feels so deeply meaningful to me because I'm at an inflection point in my own life. I'm trying to start something new, and I've suffered so much in my head, procrastinating, polishing and perfecting a thing that doesn’t exist in the world yet. So I’m gonna start today (for real this time) and find out where it leads.
Lumi says as we walk, the way appears.
And even Jesus, I suspect, would rather take the wheel of a moving car.
So, my friend, this is your sign. Stop suffering in your thoughts and start the car.
Jesus loves a moving car. Only then does he take the wheel and steer it towards the depths of your calling. So get out of your own head, and out of his way.
A moving surely meets his own luck someday.
If Adam is the standard, why are you only applying the standard to women?
Adam was a virgin too, single, childless and RICH!
Yet somehow, people invoke Adam and Eve to demand that a woman must be a virgin, while conveniently forgetting that Adam also came with no sexual history, no children, and no previous relationships.
If you’re going to use Adam as the blueprint, apply the whole blueprint; not just the parts that police women.
I’m divorced so it’s up to you if you listen or not.
1. Whatever you accept while dating will get worse once you get married.
2. If he’s mean to his family, you’re in for a ride
3. KINDNESS IS NOT ENOUGH. I know the bar is low but if a man being kind is enough to sway you then you’re in trouble. Does he have the core qualities you value in a man, i don’t mean a perfect man but a man who ticks most of the CORE qualities.
4. If you’re desperate to get married you’ll do anything and take anything to stay married.
5. Compromise is key, don’t expect a perfect man, work with a man who’s willing to listen and grow with you.
There’s more but I’ll stop here.