middlemittelstadt

“you can call me Kim”

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Day 1 of trying to get @Casablancas_J to give a shout-out to my boyfriend, Austin. He loves you more than anything!

[Kim Kardashian @KimKardashian]

My birthday baby girl Chi Chi turns 4 today! My independent baby girl twin. You are the most lovable huggable snuggable baby girl on the planet. The ultimate princess!

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Red heads should not date red heads because the red head you’re dating looks like your red head cousin and not your red head boyfriend or girlfriend

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Hey @Casablancas_J my boyfriend loves you and it would mean the world for a shoutout to Austin G! 🙌🏼

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Others: *silence*
Me: “Auntie Kris, it’s me, Todd Kraines”
@KimKardashian @khloekardashian

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

being allergic to everything sucks

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Bawling my eyes out watching the episode of #KUWTK where @KimKardashian helps Alice go home to her family 😭😭😭

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Life tip: make sure you’re clocked on for every poop you take at work because that’s 10 minutes of paid vacation.

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

@IGet0Girls When Sidney Crosby won the gold medal for Canada and shit on all you Americans

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Bc my dad was talking about Twitter today and I’m scared

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Do people still tweet?

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

@MaddieMcintire It just means the moments he has with you are more precious to him!! ❤️❤️

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Me today:

DON’T WALK OUT ON YOUR JOB
DON’T WALK OUT ON YOUR JOB
DON’T WALK OUT ON YOUR JOB
DON’T WALK OUT ON YOUR JOB
DON’T WALK OUT ON YOUR JOB
DON’T WALK OUT ON YOUR JOB

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

“You fire my BFF I fire myself”

[Tony Hawk @tonyhawk]

at a Covid testing site (wearing masks), handing over paperwork for me & two of my kids:
woman looking over papers: "okay... Anthony, Keegan and Kadence... Hawk? Are you guys related to Tony Hawk?"
me: yes
her: "Are you pulling my leg?"
me: no, we are all directly related to him

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Is @_BIGCAT still around?? Haven’t heard from you in a while. What’s up my dude???

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Ugh love you

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

Crying over grey’s anatomy it’s fine

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

@IGet0Girls You mean how we we drink until 3am and then go to class together at 8??

[middlemittelstadt @sarahmitt_]

I have lost a lot or perspective for Morgan Wallen after the stuff I just saw.