Sarah Kapp

I genuinely like most people and things.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

When you’re walking alone at night and keep hearing a strange noise, thinking someone is behind you.. when it is, in fact, excedrin and tums rattling around in your very own fanny pack.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

It is a humbling experience to accuse your boyfriend of smelling when it is in fact you who smells.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

@thej0aquindead Nooo.. got to keep it long for your Viking braid 💁‍♀️

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

It’s like when a tree falls in the woods. If you make your going out with friends/crowded bar ig stories private and your wear a mask/social distance stories public, can you still get/spread coronavirus?? Yes. Yes you can.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

In honor of 4/20 I’m going to do what I’ve been doing lately which is take an edible, forget, feel astonished that whatever I’m eating tastes SO amazing, remember and then get a monstrous case of the giggles. 10/10 recommend.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

After spending so much time in jammies, I’ve decided I will exclusively wear moo moos when I reenter the public sphere (which let’s be honest was already my trajectory pre-quarantine).

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

At least I don’t have to worry about my grandparents getting coronavirus since they’ve already been dead for years! #darkhumor #coping

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

Proud of myself for not trying to cut my own bangs.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

The moth in my room is not respecting the deal we just made to mind our own business.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

Love is Blind did social distancing before it was cool. #podlove

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

Sooo between coronavirus and Sarah Palin being unveiled on The Masked Singer this may be an end of days/Noah’s arc situation.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

Do you ever want to run away, move to Orlando and become an adorable Disney blogger? Or is that just me?

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

@AllysonKoerner #relatable

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

Life is strange when you’re happy you drooled in your sleep because it means you weren’t stress clenching your jaw.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

Kid at heart in that I’m eating cereal for dinner.. old lady at heart in that I’m watching Jeopardy while I eat it. 🤷‍♀️

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

As I explained to @thej0aquindead that it’s not that I don’t LIKE wearing white.. it’s just I’m clumsy and it’ll inevitably get dirty, I dropped a spoon on the floor which bounced and flew back up, splattering me with marinara sauce.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

I think I’m witnessing two potential jurors have a meet cute at jury duty and it’s taking all of me to not clap my hands in excitement and stage whisper “FALL IN LOVE” at them.

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

Between Endgame and this week’s GoT, the fictional anxiety feels so real. 😬😅😅

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

When you’re attempting to spend a day doing Marie Kondo-lite and put on The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 for background entertainment and end up a foot from the tv crying surrounded by stuff. #efficiency

[Sarah Kapp @sarahmkapp]

Love is picking someone up from the airport. True love is going to the Burbank airport by accident and then LAX.