Sara Sullivan

A good bass fisher, a dynamite kisser.

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

I swear to God, if any of you spoil the Masked Singer finale for me, I will come to your house and pour one thousand pounds of Applebees ranch into your gas tank.

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

Y’all, I may be good at blackjack. Time will tell.

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

“I’ve eaten smoked salmon from the Atlanta airport. There’s nothing in this country that can hurt me.” -my husband, J. Ben Herring IV

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

I’m glad Joan Rivers isn’t alive to see what y’all are wearing these days, because I truly believe these cargo pants would kill her. #genz

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

Popping on to tell y’all that I’m on a mission to get my husband to agree to an above ground pool. Is this what the kids call “manifesting”?

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

Are any other elderly millennials “office clubbing” today? (Aggressively listening to Ace of Base after drinking an over-steeped green tea.)

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

I keep getting emails from Ace Hardware with the subject line “You are the chosen one.” And while I know that it is 100% spam, I’m also very curious to see why they think so. #toclickornottoclick

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

My husband is catching me up on current events while I slather Aquaphor® over every inch of my body.

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

POV: it’s a Saturday morning in 2023. I’m sipping coffee, watching the Real World New Orleans Homecoming, and sharing a strawberry Uncrustable with my dog.

Guess I’m back on Twitter?

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

Dissertation: The Santa Clause was inspired by Season 1, Episode 2 of the original Night Court.

(I just started watching Night Court)

[David Knight @KnightTimeNow]

The truth is this program was not made to bail out renters. It was made to bail out banks & mortgage companies who held leans for landlords. This program bailed out cities,towns and this governor’s states highest earners to keep their wealth and investments safe. He knows that.

[Julián Castro @JulianCastro]

It amazes me how Fox News doesn’t believe a word of what law enforcement says when they execute a search warrant against Donald Trump but believes every single claim by law enforcement when they execute an unarmed Black man.

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

How ‘bout them logs? 📣

*deferred maintenance backlogs

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

I’m laid up in bed with Covid (again), so I decided to check in on my old stories (#DaysofOurLives). Today, Marlena was possessed by a demon (again). They got her back (they always do). LSS, I spent the afternoon with my thoughts, and we should be calling it “Stefanomicron.”

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

My husband: “It’s annoying when people who don’t regularly tweet suddenly decide to weigh in on an issue.”

Me: “So you’re mad that I have sporadic outbursts about Edible Arrangements?”

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

An edible arrangement, but with chicken nuggets and those cute little bottles of Fireball.

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

@sacwriter My perfect burger: 90/10, mix an egg to bind beef & season w/ dry ranch dressing mix. Press some chopped bacon & blue cheese into one side of the patty. Refrigerate. Sear in a hot skillet to get a nice crust. Once you flip, the bacon grease will drip down into the burger.

[Sara Sullivan @saramsullivan]

Just popping on to see if anyone remembers where I put my Social Security card. I feel like I told y’all.

[John Robert Allman @Johnny_Allman]

The CDC says take off your robes. Take off your robes. Do it quickly. Come on. I don’t know. Just take off your robes.

[The Washington Post @washingtonpost]

Preachers and their $5,000 sneakers: Why one man started an Instagram account showing churches’ wealth https://t.co/I8UTEaeBhT