Nemo🦈🫧

bug shit

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

@clairevsbirdman CONGRATULATIONS IM SO PROUD OF YOU

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“I could never be ambidextrous because I don’t want to be skinny”

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

@clairevsbirdman this is crazy I was thinking about her this morning. we yearn for jungle potty

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

discussing our cat

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

@clairevsbirdman there must be a conspiracy against hot dubstep girls cuz this same thing happened to me🤨

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“you guys are just mad cuz you’ve never seen brown lasers” - my colorblind friend

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“I am like geriatric with my farts”
“ooooo that’s not a good word to use for your farts”

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“I don’t wanna park next to that shark lookin car”

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

need a wet bottle of Gatorade straight outta the festival cooler

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

@clairevsbirdman so where do I stream

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“see watching the weather is always funny to me because my name’s all over it. like 9pm Rain yeah I’ll be there”

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

we still dream about you, hotel thea

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

I still have mine but they took practice legs

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

getting increasingly concerned

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

turned 23 yesterday and nobody came into my house to cut my legs off

when does it happen im scared

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“ohhhh scary NEMO cuz you’re NEMO. HAHAHA. I don’t know why I just realized that, I thought it was scary n emo”💀

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

my mom wants new couches and she offered me hers for zero dollars

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“Kiwi is no longer allowed to bite patrons since the law has been passed by phat pussy wife”

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

I go bar hopping and wake up with 9 new followers and 6 dms about dinner plans and for my hangover I’ll just stare at myself in the mirror like “you did this to your fucking self”

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“I ate an entire fudge pop while you were outside being gay”

[Nemo🦈🫧 @scarynemo]

“babe don’t come over here and flap air”