Queen of Saigon

I can drive with my feet.

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

Friend: that meme you shared about wanting to die, do you you really feel like that orrr...?
Me:

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

Spent the last 5+ years growing out my bangs just for a Snapchat filter to make me want these

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

I’m blessed in the way that I got a face for radio and a voice for silent films

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

One time I brake checked this bitch riding my ass, she flew around me just to brake check me back and it made her hit the next red light where I just sat and pointed and laughed at her the entire time and I think it’s become a core memory for me tbh

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

Finally caved and tried @bradmondonyc ‘s hair dye. It’s so thick and the color is wonderful and it smells like stripper titties 🤤 (and that is NOT a complaint)

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

Acting like a cunt is the only way to get shit sorted with healthcare professionals these days, so thanks for turning me into what I hate. #fuckdoctors #healthcareisascam

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

I wish when someone defriended you it took away any likes/tags/shit too. You don’t wanna be my friend then fuck you bitch, no likes/internet validation for you

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

I saw someone say Jenna Ortega looked like female Pete Davidson and I can’t unsee it 🤣😭

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

Sad that @taylorswift13 didn’t make an updated version of “22” when she was 32…
Could be like “we’re overwhelmed, bored, exhausted at the same time, it’s miserable but we’ve accepted it”

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

I was pointed and laughed at by a chubby, lives in moms basement at 28, incel looking mother fucker at work last night and it took everything in me to not ask what he thought he was laughing at looking how he did. I hate retail.

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

Manager: you won’t move up here with that attitude!
Me: Oh… did you… think I… wanted… that…? 🫠

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

One of my biggest fears I never thought technology would cause is being seen in my neighbors doorcam footage getting my DoorDash order off my porch in my robe with no eyebrows on

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

RAGE, FUCKING RAGE #Cuphead beat it next try, doe #CupheadDLC

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

@reeses it’s cool that you put the effort into the pumpkins, trees, hearts, etc shaped Reese’s but you could literally be like here’s *insert season/holiday here* eggs and we would all still buy them 🧡

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

You can tell too much about a person based on the subreddits they follow

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

a/s/l/: 32/f/eating mashed potatoes in the bathtub

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

I was always taught to treat others how you would like to be treated, but the problem is I treat people well and am left disappointed when I get shit on in return

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

Dudes that hit on chicks on public Facebook comment sections: what is your success rate with that method?

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

Hair tied my old iPhone 5 to my arm and trailed my headphone cord through the sleeves. How else is an innovative peasant supposed to listen to music while doing yard work?

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

I’m all for hyping up other females but stop calling 6/10s or below “stunning”, giving ugly girls false confidence like that really fucks with our heads lol

[Queen of Saigon @schmuuur]

One of my favorite stories of work incompetence is when I stopped showing up at a shitty bartending job and they called me 2 weeks later asking I could cover someone else’s shift