Sean Lanoie

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@Bruwulf We went through so many batteries with those things.

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@omgsidewalks I was unemployed a year. Got a job 3 months ago. I’m still getting the rejection notices for things I applied to before getting hired.

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@FiredUpCoug His stuff is great!

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@ImJimR87 @amazon Try this extension. https://t.co/XEqIxQbkHy

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@MikeBales It’s at least a 2 hour commitment to get down into one of those things.

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@ThePapaManDave Damn, those are the guys I wish were sponsors.

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@marlins_man Wow! I’ve always wondered what it must cost since I started noticing you back in the SF Giants home games. You rock!

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@BadgedPatriot I’m bookmarking this in case I start seeing their ads just for reading this.

[MADDIE @omgmaddie]

When you didn’t bring a book but you’re in a situation where you could be reading

[greg @greg16676935420]

When President Trump said he wanted more things made in America I didn’t realize the plan was to just rename everywhere America

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@physicsgeek In the back of my head, I always wonder if this stuff comes about because any politician will just read the remarks written for them by any of their staff. Then it comes out the remarks weren’t well researched, but they are unable to state that they’re just a mouthpiece.

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@Icalbert101 He could be the real life Marco Rubio meme. I want to see that happen.

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@MikeBales I like that phrase, “real pretending.”

[The Redheaded libertarian @TRHLofficial]

People the Grim Reaper is not allowed near:

1. Dick Van Dyke. You leave him alone.
2. Mel Brooks. Don’t even think about it.
3. Reba. I will throw hands.
4. Keanu Reeves. Back off.
5. Mel Gibson. No touchy.
6. Michael Caine. The Muppets can’t handle another devastating blow.

[Hoosier Hammer 🔨🦬🏆🏈 @Brentonmfender]

This video of Dolly Parton covering Stairway to Heaven is going around. Here's a higher quality version for you to enjoy. RIP to the Queen of Country and an absolute angel on Earth.

[Sean Lanoie @sdlanoie]

@asymmetricinfo Huh, free rider problems.

[Planet Of Memes @PlanetOfMemes]

Rest in peace, Legend. 👢 🎸

[Terrible Maps @TerribleMaps]

Dolly Parton approval ratings by state

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

At an Italian restaurant, I was defeated by a lasagna the size of a cinder block.

I could not finish. Half remained on the plate.

I wanted to ask for a take-out box. My vocabulary slipped.

I looked at the server, a cheerful Italian-American named Marco, and said with quiet sorrow:

"Could I have a coffin for the rest?"

Marco’s eyebrows shot into his hairline.

"A coffin?!"

"Yes," I nodded solemnly. "The pasta has perished. I must carry the remains home."

Marco stared at me for three seconds.

Then Marco began laughing so hard he had to hold onto the edge of the booth.

He ran to the back. Two minutes later, he returned carrying a large aluminum container.

On the lid, Marco had drawn a small tombstone in black marker that said:

*R.I.P. LASAGNA — GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN.*

He handed it to me with two hands. "My condolences for your dinner, brother."

I carried the coffin home with full military honors.