Sean Jay Kay

yak yak yak

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

One minute you're on a flight, the next minute you're tweeting about it. Technology really is amazing.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

Silent auctions are an insult to blind people everywhere.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

A modern day Duck Tails would have Scrooge McDuck jumping into a pool of coconut water cause it'd be more expensive if not practical.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

when a wheelchaired person crosses their legs, the marionette becomes the puppeteer. #itsawonderfullife

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

@HollyJMitchell Vote NO on AB 612 & AB 2293. Uber is great. I don't vote but will vote against you if I have to. #CAlovesUber

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

TED Talks should expand and create BIGOTED Talks. The world's most influential bigots need a forum for their ideas.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

Once paper money goes extinct, it's going to be much harder to snort coke through our phones. #technicalDifficulties

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

i'm beginning to think the twitter bird is not real; so far, millions of tweets but no shits.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

putting mint and basil in water makes it fancy because poor people are unimaginative.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

MLK could have really used his own day to take some time off. Hindsight is 20-20, even for Dr. King.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

A busy day for my father includes bathing. I should also mention that he is a 6000 lb elephant.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

We should all take a page from Panama's book and realize Christmas is about fighting your neighbor over candy thrown from oversized floats.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

No need to waste my time now, I can slamdance when I'm old and gray.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

There is nothing better than an old black man saying oooOOOWEE!

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

Thank GOD boogers are odorless.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

All this Jamba Juice and I've never seen a single Jamba Tree.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

OK. I'll be the first to admit - I'd rather be peed on than spit on.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

Do open but unused condoms count as Christmas decorations?

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

I'm guessing Ragtime was created to help women menstruate. The Great Entertainer has a whole new meaning.

[Sean Jay Kay @seansarc]

Pilot said we'll be sitting on the taxiway, which sounds like a crime - unless he said shitting, which is just unfortunate.