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Fat guy trying to be less fat. Boss of 16. Clover is my sidekick.

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Its like 45 degrees in NYC -- why are these broadcasters bundled up like nanook of the north?

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Boy the audio mix for this parade is fucking terrible.

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Glassy eyes, slurred speech - yeah these two wine moms are hammered too

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Since when does this parade have superfans?

Do people obsess over this fuckin thing?

Its called autism

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I swear I see Ariana grande crawling around under this bitches coat

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ICE just tried arresting the Dora balloon.

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What kind of last name is Kotb anyway? They're called vowels...

Oh fuck Al Roker is hammered

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Oh god these two bitches can't even walk a straight line. #parade

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Carney: SHES EVERYWHERE!

Me: yeah, I was wiping my ass this morning and she came out and hit that high note.

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My mom: how does Cynthia Erivo even wipe her butt with those nails?

Me: easy, ehe just used Ariana Grande's hands.

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@DuvalMagic what's the voice behind the gearbox logo when booting up BL4? It sounds like a baby acting angrily tough and I need more of it

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@EvanAndKatelyn so... can we see more cement stuff? that cement flower pot had me wanting to start making my own

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@tacobellcare Hey yo, I need to reach out because of a terrible experience today. One of your local W-B PA franchises gave me a bell grande in a plastic bag. And that's just the tip. Some serious issues with this order, and this is the third time in a row.

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@WWECommunity Good afternoon! I'm looking for a phone contact with someone I can speak with about possibly raising some funding for my local police department to get a k9 unit when smackdown comes to town. Can you help point me in the right direction?

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@JeremyClarkson It was the best pumpkin... in the world.

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@LizWillis_ @RSBNetwork You're not in Scranton, you're in Wilkes-Barre. Scranton is 20 miles away. Scranton is a liberal haven. Wilkes-Barre voted red.

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@RSBNetwork Hey, make sure your anchors know they're NOT in Scranton today. Wilkes-Barre is NOT the liberal sh!thole that Biden was born in. There's 20 miles in between Scranton and Wilkes-Barre.

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@djWHEAT Happy VXIX day bud!

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@KTrevorWilson @RondaRousey I'm scared the men's rumble match isn't going to be up to the hype

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@itsBayleyWWE Is that Julian's glass from the Trailer Park Boys?