Turning 27 is so brutal because it no longer becomes about potential. You either are, or you are not. Can, or can not. There's no more ambiguity. There's nobody else to blame, no more programmed "growth spurts". At 27 it becomes all up to you.
I'm sorry your dad left for cigarettes, never came back, and didn't love you. Every little girl deserves a great dad that loves and dotes on them. You miserable hag