Shand Thomas

a hacked up everyday wannabe

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

Buying a cemetery plot at the mall wyd

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

3-5 more TV channels in Don’t Worry Darling land and I’d never suspect a thing

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

At the baby playground and why does this dog have a hog

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

Phantom of the Altima

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

Pro-life dude tried to goad me on FB but jokes on him I FORGOT MY PASSWORD

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

I think the real problem is no one gets slizard any more

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

@miumiuseum recipe plz

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

@miumiuseum Plz share!!

[Brooklyn Comedy Collective @ComedyBrooklyn]

Look! Check (it) Out! a library improv show
with Florence Friebe, Fu Goto @shandthomas & opener Morgan

🎟 7pm: https://t.co/2Q0CNSyQHj

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

Can’t stop listening to Never Really Over by Katy Perry!! I WANT MY LIFE BACK !!!!!!

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

@jennyarimoto

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

@jennyarimoto Have been debating watching and now I’m *influenced*

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

Very stressed about my library books this Saturday Night

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

Watching cable and ET is just YouTube clips now

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

In hindsight, going from quarantine to the airport is a tad jarring

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

@brooksallison_ I didn’t like it xoxo gossip girl

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

Found a list of ADD tips from when I was first diagnosed! Hope someone finds this helpful!!!!!

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

Showing your friend around your hometown

[Shand Thomas @shandthomas]

I wish I had a kid to prank