Shawna Renee Farris

I'm just me. A little crazy, a tad insecure and I'm obsessed with my kids and food. That's it.

[Katie Morton @hellokatiemo]

You know you’re nosy as hell if you find yourself scrolling through the Venmo feed.

[Ben Schwartz @rejectedjokes]

I am in my 30s and I have never spelled the word rhythm correctly without the aid of spellcheck.

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

@james_mccoy_t @NRA Generalize much?

[Nick Hutchins @nicholasrhutch]

once you just push past the shame and allow yourself to put ice cubes in your wine, your whole world opens up

[Chris Murphy 🟧 @ChrisMurphyCT]

Nobody needs an AR-15 to hunt.

Nobody needs a semi-automatic rifle to defend their home.

But mass shooters NEED these weapons in order to murder as many people as efficiently as possible.

And so nobody will miss them when they are illegal - except for the killers.

[James Cameron @JimCameron]

Kids these days.

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

I’m way too invested in @BachelorABC. 🤷‍♀️

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

@laneyrhopkins 🤔

[Sara @saravllxn]

TEACH YOUR KIDS TO TIP. just had a 20 top of high schoolers with 300 dollars worth of food tip me FREAKING 10 DOLLARS

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

@laneyrhopkins What???

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

@grahamelliot According to my mom, yes. One year I made homemade cranberry sauce. Never again. My mom won’t come if I don’t have the canned stuff.

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

Just the title President doesn’t automatically command or deserve respect. Gotta earn it dude. Never understood that argument.

[Josh Peck @ItsJoshPeck]

If you’re a bad tipper, you’re a bad everything.

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

@hennaahmedx @laneyrhopkins

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

It’s a gift that my college aged daughter likes and values me and my opinion. I don’t take it for granted.

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

@laneyrhopkins @tcoughlin28 It’s never me!!!

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

@justinbieber you’re a good looking, talented young man but your mama needs to take you to get a haircut 💇‍♂️

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

@laneyrhopkins In his defense he didn’t purposely tape over it. Well...I don’t think he did.🤔

[Shawna Renee Farris @shawna_farris]

I just gave in and took a muscle relaxer for my pulled stomach muscle. It’s supposed to make you drowsy. One of two things will happen. I will be up ALL night or I will be comatose in the morning. So, on that note, goodnight or not...