bae

dafuq 💯

[bae @shawtydotcom]

ur 30 and u still haven’t done crack yet?

[bae @shawtydotcom]

everybodys talking about “twerking” this and “dwerking” that…why is nobody bwerking?

[bae @shawtydotcom]

and thats on queeriod

[bae @shawtydotcom]

@mlymgd ive been doing this!!

[bae @shawtydotcom]

its genuinely this bad for me rn fml

[bae @shawtydotcom]

just balled tf out at ross

[bae @shawtydotcom]

@JuryDutyPresent can i be ur next victim

[bae @shawtydotcom]

man i really hope the next job i land is actually secretly a tv show where they prank me for a week and then reveal the prank and give me $150k for being a great employee

[bae @shawtydotcom]

its hijabichella this year

[bae @shawtydotcom]

i wish i could twerk symmetrically

[bae @shawtydotcom]

all my nightmares lately have been really good horror movie ideas. just had one about these girls that get lured into a parking garage by a serial killer who’s been keeping people there & its a labyrinth of rooms and levels so even if u escape the killer the garage will kill u

[bae @shawtydotcom]

pussy tight like this parking spot

[bae @shawtydotcom]

shit i think im gonna get fired

[bae @shawtydotcom]

u bitches live in the home of phobia but i live in the all love garden ❤️

[bae @shawtydotcom]

how many times do i have to get scammed on depop before i put the app away

[CJ @Iiononfire]

dressed like this to get a dafuq latte

[bae @shawtydotcom]

its so crazy how rihanna dropped the best album of all time and then quit music forever

[♡ @lipglossgrinss]

i have not heard anyone talk abt this masterpiece yet . genuinely a masterpiece. she captured a very specific feeling within this one

[bae @shawtydotcom]

@mlymgd literally me rn

[bae @shawtydotcom]

organizing hangouts with my friends but referring to them as extravaganzas

[bae @shawtydotcom]

tfw hitting the griddy for ur friend