Shayna MacDiarmid

[A$AP BA$EY @_kaseyramirez]

I will not get married till I can afford an open bar. I would never disrespect my friends and family like that

[B.J. Novak @bjnovak]

Love Valentine’s Day, love New Year’s Eve, love taking the SATs, just love high pressure situations and extreme expectations in general

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

Oh yikes I’m having some very real déjà vu https://t.co/Pa91OEoYQe

[Total Frat Move @totalfratmove]

Secondhand anxiety is very real

[Gord Downie @gorddownie]

Statement -

[Whitney Beers @WhitBeers]

First tweet in 6 months.. embarrassing @shaymacdiarmid seems worthy of it. #datpussytho

[tcrom @tomcrom15]

Heart says rolling rock but bank account says cold shots

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

I'll know i'm an adult when I light a candle and think it smells like cinnamon instead of Fireball

[Rob @RealityRobbed]

If you or anyone you know has been affected by Chris Pratt and Anna Faris' divorce, please know you are not alone.

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

I didn't see this part in the new Thor movie trailer? https://t.co/TSv9doQqTd

[What The F*** Facts @WhatTheFFacts]

In Norse mythology, Loki tied one end of a rope to a goat and the other end around his testicle and began a game of tug of war.

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

That he doesn't scream the lyrics to "The night that Paddy Murphy died" https://t.co/HXjDXJ8Ah9

[joe @skotnado]

I mostly like summer because it's way easier to spread butter on things

[Larisa @LarisaSchock]

How do girls find these fine, established, smart men during college? Like half my guy friends smash beer off their foreheads

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

enough about the "mom" friend, here's a toast to the friend that always slurs "so how's your night going" to the Uber driver

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

@Laurboydd It's been 4 years why

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

@TScotty12 is he single?

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

Naming my first born son Anakin so his friends will call him Vader and yes I will prematurely accept the award for worlds coolest mom

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

"I bet Emma stone is tired of falling in love with Ryan Gosling over and over again" said no fucking human being ever

[Shayna MacDiarmid @shaymacdiarmid]

Challenge accepted https://t.co/cLsYHVXdcC

[What The F*** Facts @WhatTheFFacts]

It has been scientifically proven that your body can stay alive for many months only on water and beer.

[Justin Trudeau @JustinTrudeau]

It’s my pleasure to recognize Rebecca Schofield for her bravery, volunteerism & inspiring commitment to community. #Beccatoldmeto