shelbz

sorry I was taking a nap (she/her)

[shelbz @shelbyabts]

I live with a snake (a thread of my roommate being fake af)

[ems 🍂 @atotalposer]

THE NEW YORK TIMES PAYWALLED THE MINI CROSSWORD

[Meg @megannn_lynne]

you are currently locked in a kohl’s dressing room with 5 ill-fitting bikinis. as time goes on, the fluorescent lights will grow brighter, the AC will stop working, & the sound of katy perry’s “roar” will get louder. to escape, try on all 5 swimsuits without crying. good luck.

[Will @willne]

makes sense check the rest of them

[Tucker D. Franklin @tuckerdfranklin]

Andy Reid that first drive

[Rodger Sherman @rodger]

If you’re playing Ja’marr Chase in fantasy you don’t even have to watch the games on Sunday. Just go for a hike, look at the changing leaves etc

[milk @milkinhisbag]

i cannot buy oreos anymore they talk to me through the cupboard like the green goblin mask

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

this idiot’s not very good at hiding

[1984’s George Whorewell @EwdatsGROSS]

One day you’re hot, young and fun and the next you’re a little too into the NYT mini crossword

[Johnson County Mental Health Center @JOCOMNH]

As you may be aware, a shooting has taken place at the Chiefs Super Bowl Victory Rally. You may experience symptoms of trauma whether or not you attended, but please know you are not alone.

Call us 24/7 at 913-268-0156 or 988 or text SHARE to 741-741.

[NFL @NFL]

Chiefs rookie Felix Anudike-Uzomah makes a play in the backfield 💪

📺: #SBLVIII on CBS
📱: Stream on #NFLPlus https://t.co/dClcEDViWl

[Ashley @AshleryRenaynay]

I don’t think I’ll feel whole again until the 54th street in independence is open again

[👽brittny pierre🪩 @sleep2dream]

Elmo’s social media manager reading all the responses like