My father fled Iran during the revolution.
He landed as a young man in Paris and decided to become a doctor.
ButâŠhe failed his first year of medical school. Because he didnât speak French.
Then, he retook the first year againâŠand failed for a second time (because he still barely spoke french and was taking organic chemistry in a language with a different alphabet).
He decided to move to Brussels to give it a third try and start over.
And on his third try, heâd learned enough French to pass. He went on and graduated top of his class.
Then, he met my mother and she convinced him to come to the U.S.
He came here with $1000, a suitcase, and, yet again, didnât speak the native language (now English).
They wouldnât recognize his foreign MD and no one would give him a residency because he was a foreigner.
So he spent 2 years as a technician working barely above minimum wage.
Then finally, he was finally given a
residency in the U.S.
After residency, he joined my grandfathers practice (moms dad).
Just as he began to develop a reputation, he found himself locked out of his own office. The locks changed on him overnight.
My mother decided to get a divorce.
He had to start over, again, this time on his own.
But he didnât have the money.
And - to build a surgery center was $250,000 (in 1995 dollars).
He didnât have that kind of money.
So looked up the legal requirements and he built his own. The entire thing. Himself. To code. Actually. Out of sheer will. And built it for under $30,000 (all the money he had at the time).
Finally, he was on his own.
This time, he kept growing and growing his practice until he became the top eyelid surgeon in Maryland. And eventually, in the U.S.
Heâs done more than 16,000 cases meaning somewhere upwards of 50,000+ eyelids.
And every year he (on his own) does more eyelid cases than all of Johnâs Hopkins eye department combined.
My father taught me many lessons. Most of them through example, not preaching. Heâs not a man of many words.
But the few things he did say, heâd say with his actions over and over again:
Failures are just detours.
Donât let anyone tell you you arenât good enough for what you want.
Whatever you do, be the best.
God gave you the power to ignore, use it.
Itâs better to be envied than pitied.
You wonât even remember their name in 20 years.
Youâre only stressed because youâre underprepared.
Thereâs nothing anyone can put you through that you havenât already put yourself through that was worse.
And finallyâŠ
You only get one name, tell the world what you want it to mean by what you do with it.
****
Whenever I go through hard times I like to remember what he went through to make my life possible.
And somehow, everything always falls into focus.
PS - I get a lot credit for what Iâve done. But I often think what he accomplished was far harder than what I have. And - I donât want his sacrifice to be in vain.
PPS - Whats the best piece of advice your father (or father figure) gave you?
> be born in 2002
> pandemic takes your high school years
> ai takes your uni years
> unemployment takes the rest of your years
it's all over