Shira Michaeli

Columbia University/Jewish Theological Seminary '24 she/her
Enthusiasm Enthusiast
All views are too niche to be anything but my own

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

I'm a Ms.Frizzle in the streets, anxious insomniac in the sheets.

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

Need to stop going bouldering with people without boobs b/c they're like “Yeah I’ll solve that for you” and the only thing that would solve it for me is top surgery.

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

@TaliaRinger Banality of Evil Take (ie my favorite kind of take)

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

There needs to be a button on the car where instead of honking it apologizes profusely

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

Stop putting "A good sense of humor" on ur job requirements. U can't handle my funny

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

I want to do a presentation night but everyone has to present their suggestions for the ideal new MTA train line. This is my addition I call it the X line and it's pink and definitely flawless

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

@Elan_Levine See this is why I rain checked BTTF

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

Devastated I graduated college before I could use this as a paper title

[Stew Peters @realstewpeters]

HAPPENING IN REAL TIME: The Constitution is being replaced with the Talmud.

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

I *love* it when LinkedIn tells me that people i knew in college recently viewed my profile. Like yeah bruh, I'm also wondering what TF I'm up to

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

@reylo_canon_lol immediately looked

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

@travelingheidi @kcmillerphl !!!!!

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

A Jewish org just sent me an email about Channukah. B****, It's literally Tishrei

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

“Hamavdil Bein Kodesh Ve’cHolloween”

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

@Kosherqueen_ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

Last night I had a nightmare that I was supposed to read the fourth alliyah on rosh hashana but kept getting too distracted to practice and also it was an ortho synogogue. I woke up in a cold sweat right after the brachot.

I think I need to go to parties or something.

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

@AlyxBernstein @reylo_canon_lol It did not help that instead of making the first few classes about introducing academic Judaism and setting expectations for common language and pluralism, it cold opened with a divisive topic and an arduously complex text

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

@reylo_canon_lol rt

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

A degree in Jewish ethics didn’t prepare me for much, but every once in a while, a 7th grader asks “wait, this is off topic but like, why does religion exist?” and I’m **READY**

[Shira Michaeli @shira_michaeli]

Measure your life in love? Nah, measure your life in times you find out a teenager wrote their common app essay about you.