ShitChrisSays

Real life big boy grew up to an american loving, goat knapping, sloppy mess with akward encounters. Leaving my friends wondering Why am I friends with him?

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

@lizzyrose2

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

When you find your sister on bumble

[Harpoon Brewery @harpoonbrewery]

GIVEAWAY! 🍻🐠🦀 RT for a chance to win VIP #Boston Seafood Festival tickets for 8/13 that include a lobster bake meal!

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

"The Miami Dolphins are like Chris, they look good on paper, but they can never close" thanks Doyle

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

Bae- "so like what are we?"
Me- "we are never getting married"

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

My name is Chris and I put tattoos on kids for a living

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

My answer at trivia- Albert Einstein.
Correct answer- James dean

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

Went from a coronarita to coors light. #ragrets

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

Guna tell my grandkids about The Point- this is where grandpa became a man

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

Bought a corn hole set instead of figuring out my future #yolo

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

If Will and Emily get married then I get to be the flower girl 💐

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

Someone pls explain to Julie we don't have to go the gym today. Arm day can consist of picking up our beer and putting it down #bicepcurl 💪🏼

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

Raise your hand if you know where I am

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

Remember, you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friends.

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

the ladies love me

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

"Wait you're actually giving me this"

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

I like to be the center of attention. There I said it finally four years later

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

*picks up full water bottle*
"Is that a glass water bottle?"
"No it's plastic"
"Damn that's heavy for plastic"
"There's water in it....."

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

I've been trying to figure out for four years now if Julie is actually is my friend

[ShitChrisSays @shitcrosesays]

T-minus 8 days until we officially kickoff Summer Blackout 2k16 boys and girls