Foxxytocin

Artisanal fart curator

[Read Jackson Rising @JPHilllllll]

The simplest explanation of how profit is theft that I’ve ever seen

[The Onion @TheOnion]

Conservative Boycotting Bud Light Forced To Drink 6 Cans Of Something Else Before Hitting Kids https://t.co/JQPHH8JNT2

[Brian Krassenstein @krassenstein]

BREAKING NEWS: It turns out that Trump is being charged with 34, YES 34 counts of falsifying business records. This is more than just about Stormy Daniels.

It’s a WIN for Law and Order!

Republicans can try and blame this on George Soros but an INDEPENDENT Grand Jury does not just indict a former president with 34 counts because some billionaire donated to a PAC, who then gave money to Alvin Bragg.

We told you Trump was corrupt back in 2016.

[🥀_ Imposter_🖕 @Imposter_Edits]

"Psss, hey. turn off your bodycam I'm one of you, don't I get special treatment?"

[Jeff Tiedrich @itsJeffTiedrich]

I don't wave a Joe Biden flag. I don't wear a Joe Biden hat. I don't have a single item of Joe Biden branded anything. and I sure as fuck wouldn't go fucking apeshit and riot if Joe Biden were arrested for criming. because I'm not some fucked up member of some fucked up cult

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

Please please please let this catch on like wildfire

[Foxxytocin @shmaderable]

You ever cry so hard at work that your boss gives you a massive raise? 🫠

[Foxxytocin @shmaderable]

You know you’re getting old when they’re using Tony Hawk to advertise joint supplements.

[Lazzyyyyyy @em_Lazzy]

When I use 🙂 this is what I mean

[ally @missmayn]

it's actually crazy we figured out how to grow real diamonds that are cheaper and better quality than the real thing and so many people are still like, no thanks the suffering is what makes it special.

[Stella ✨ she/they ✨ @cryptidfarts]

I would do heinous things for the kirby side table

[Emily Murnane @emily_murnane]

Oh they’ve just given up now

[uncle mom @mayamanion]

My son got a face tat. Go ahead and bottle feed, it doesn’t matter.

[Foxxytocin @shmaderable]

I’m so glad that Aldi’s shopping cart prices are inflation resistant. Imagine having to have a half dollar on you at all times just to be able to get a shopping cart.

[Foxxytocin @shmaderable]

I never thought I had ADHD until I worked for a company that requires you to open your phone to get your MFA code and manually enter it to login to EVERYTHING. I forget what I’m doing every time and end up deep in a Twitter thread or watching shitty TikToks for way too long.

[Foxxytocin @shmaderable]

I swear, IT is the only field where someone can say, “Huzzah!” during a successful troubleshooting call and every damn nerd on the call chuckles.