Heefus McFartjoke

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

Watching both parties melt down over polls is my new favorite hobby.

Unity is a myth.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@RonnieRadke

Popular Monster recently joined my shortlist of albums that I listen to from start to finish. My Son woulda loved this. Seriously, thank you.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

Well now...after all these years I reckon it's time to actually try this twitter stuff again.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@ARhaeee miss your face butthole.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@caityweaver I was just enveloped by your story on @TheRock . Your prose was wonderful, and it makes my heart smile to see actual writing.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

Hotel folks lime to getcha durnk. Oh, you just puked on the floor, how about a Mai Thai?

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@maaaandyxoxo Of the toilet?

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@maaaandyxoxo I am on my way there, does it smell like armpits and shame?

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

Headed to Orlando, the armpit of Florida, and joy was felt by all.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@maaaandyxoxo Happy birthday butthole!

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@maaaandyxoxo It is not real coffee. #americasmostwanted

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@SpiritAirlines Please advise your Ft Lauderdale gate agents; just because someone looks normal does not mean that they are not disabled.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

I gambled on airport sushi yesterday. I have yet to achieve orbit by either oral or anal explosion. Job well done.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@ARhaeee Hi douchfeather. I was forced to wake up and do things. I blame you.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@sydniiizzle_ Yup, it is gonna be beautiful on the river today. Slackass.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@maaaandyxoxo Moving away tend to create that feeling. He looked good, and I nibbled him a little.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

Watchin Jamie get her toofs did. #bonerrific

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@maaaandyxoxo I got to hug your Dad today, he was verrry cuddly.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

A harp is not a good defensive weapon.

[Heefus McFartjoke @showersleeper]

@sydniiizzle_ What are the classes? I can teach them for you, and give double credits.