Jessie

🤘👼🤘

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

If you are a taxi contact me immediately

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Store in a cool, dry place? How about you get off my back

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Who’s flying the Santa flag tonight?

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Bedtime routine of cracking a lacroix and leaving it on my night stand to drink in the morning

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Sorry babe, the shacket stays on during sex

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

I’ve just been informed that Twilight was not directed by David Fincher

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Oh I actually discovered that artist all on my own (Spotify recommendation based AI generated playlist)

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Manic Monday being sung by my sleep paralysis demon from the other side of a busy underpass as the hold music on my doctors call

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

It feels sometimes like once you start fucking up you don’t know how to stop? Like youve rolled a cobble down an embankment and it’s getting greater and greater air time while all you can do is wince and laugh hysterically until it catapults into the water and you feel sad relief

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

My final uni paper is a 20 page critique of my profs 2003 paper that is also one week late wish me luck!

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Academia hates Wikipedia because it is anarchist, academia hates anarchy because they love horizontal power structures, I am challenging academia by sourcing all my information from Wikipedia even after spending 10s of thousands of dollars being told not to

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Very suspicious that my IG ad algorithm is always either wedding dresses, lingerie, or therapy based on the text conversation I am having with my bf

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Getting kicked out of the parq casino for falling out of your chair on New Year’s Eve is a right of passage right?

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

I had a dream I was showing my younger self how to butter bread the proper way due to deep underlying shame and humiliation

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Unforgivably hungover at the winter wonderland skate, just shuffling down the ice deeply sighing

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Noting in my project report under Difficulties that I broke up with my boyfriend and he held my bag of wool hostage

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

The thing about going drinking with me when single and unchecked is that there will always be a fun little repercussion to discuss in the morning

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

What to do about baby bird in apartment ceiling

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

Finally discovered that the days I am irrationally angry at my bf are the days he wears overalls and now we can live peacefully

[Jessie @sickn4sty420]

@em_il_yn The most unhinged thing u could’ve said