Chad Buttholes Murray

hollaquepesa

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

@THEVlOLET Omg I am sorry I promised I searched this before I tweeted it but nothing came up I’m sorry 😞

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

Can we put a toilet on our wedding registry??

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

My wedding colors are when the toilet turns pink and orange 🥰

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

I never fucked beavis I never fucked butthead

[vi @vimentality7]

Why do all people with POTS like Renaissance faires

[patrick @Patrickposting]

“We make people forget grocery prices are so high by making everything unsafe to eat.”

[detty @0ddette]

me to my family every morning in our new abode:

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

Flaming mignon

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

I remember zooming in on this pic on my family’s computer and my sisters 6th grade boyfriend walked in

[Ankit @terakyalenadena]

Lindsay was THAT GIRL in the early 2000s

[wicked wigger of the west @Nick_Cerveza]

(forgetting the phrase "waxing poetic") dude quit waning gibbous

[❥ 𝑪𝒐𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒆 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒔 ❥ @tonyhawktruther]

Ever since I left the city you!

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

Any time someone makes a new Slack channel, I make another with the same people and same name plus “circlejerk”

[Fatmireplay2muchbruhh @Crapmire]

bojangles unchained

[sarah hagi @KindaHagi]

this is one of those life changing tweets

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

People I went to middle school with liking my moms post about me and @Crapmire getting engaged #loveyall

[Joey Nova NYC 🍇 @thejoeynova]

I used to be confused about the Madonna-Whore complex when I first heard about it as a kid because I was like well isn’t Madonna kind of slutty too

[kelsey sutton @kelseytsutton]

quit my job today and a sales guy out of Germany sent me an incredibly heartfelt slack thanking me for teaching him the phrase “does a bear shit in the woods” when responding to something that is an obvious yes 😭

[bella @earlygirl__]

if you’re good enough at your job, you can show a little midriff at the office.

[Chad Buttholes Murray @sidebuwub]

Why I was born as a garden girlie:
-not allergic to poison ivy
-always cold so I don’t get sweaty easily
-$0 water bill (we’re on a well)
-mosquitos don’t give a fuck about me
#blessed

[Kali @Kali_de_Armas]

coworker must have recently learned the phrase "unbeknownst to me" because he's been saying it constantly, and i don't think he's used it correctly a single time. today he said, "unbeknownst to me, my wife and i tried that new Chinese restaurant down the street. It's pretty good"