𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞

how very dare you

[Katya @katya_zamo]

I cannot wait for the next asteroid to hit and vaporize us all within seconds.

[𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞 @sidneyypaigee]

Someone at work tonight told me I looked like Kourtney Kardashian and now you can’t tell me nothinggggggg

[𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞 @sidneyypaigee]

Can you request a lobotomy through maple?

[𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞 @sidneyypaigee]

“So do shiny lips get you lots of tips??”

[𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞 @sidneyypaigee]

I need someone to crack my back like I’m a glow stick

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

I always think my feelings are SO COMPLICATED but then Spring happens and I’m like oh no wait I’m fine

[𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞 @sidneyypaigee]

Since it’s T-shirt weather I’ve been getting so many compliments on my tattoos and it’s such an ego boost. Why yes thank you,I know I’m cool

[𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞 @sidneyypaigee]

“My first heterosexual crush was Piccolo from Dragonball Z”

[sarah @heavenbrat]

as a girl i should be allowed to speak to the moon directly

[Trixie Mattel™ @trixiemattel]

Everybody needs to calm down (mostly me)

[𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞 @sidneyypaigee]

I just had the sudden realization that I’m turning 28 this year. Nobody talk to me for 3 days I’m mourning

[clintoris @clintoris]

Just ruined my night (processed an emotion)

[Matt. @MattTheBrand]

me as a therapist: have you tried sautéing a little garlic and onion

[chrissy @chrissychlapp]

i love to tattoo silly little things on my silly little body with silly little to no meaning bc i’m so silly

[Trixie Mattel™ @trixiemattel]

UNHhhh:

[𝕾𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖊𝖞 @sidneyypaigee]

My biggest toxic trait is that I think if I met Matty Healy at a bar that I would be able to pull him

[Shafeeq @Y2SHAF]

i can’t explain it but crossing the road is honestly so embarrassing