Alan Bell

Retired, a sometime amateur astronomer and citizen of the Zooniverse, with a love of BBQs

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Being halfway through January feels a bit like being halfway through a marathon, except your shoes have fallen apart, you’re completely out of water, one of your legs is broken, you’re in last place, it’s all uphill, you’ve no energy left, the temperature’s plummeting, you keep tripping over, there’s no prize at the end and when you cross the finish line you immediately have to do another marathon. And you never even asked to run these bloody marathons in the first place.

[MarshFamilySongs @MarshSongs]

Here's our final song of 2023, about the deserving folk receiving #NewYearHonours & the contrast with the pathetic cronyism in @trussliz & @BorisJohnson appointees. It's to the tune "There Is Nothing Like A Dame" but called "Does Liz Truss Not Feel Ashamed?" 🎶Happy New Year!🥳🍾

[Buitengebieden @buitengebieden]

Loudest Silent Night ever.. 😂

[Science girl @sciencegirl]

‘You're gonna need a bigger boat’
https://t.co/KsP2TvVuLx

[NHS Million @NHSMillion]

Huge thanks to all of the NHS staff who are doing their best to bring a bit of cheer to patients over the festive period 💙

[Philip Serrell @PhilipSerrell]

Very funny. Thank you @andywyman

[Quite Interesting @qikipedia]

Looking for something Christmassy you can do from home? Join Joanna Lumley, Stephen Fry and more for a star-studded Carol Concert. Streaming free to all in the hope of donations to Macmillan Cancer Support. Premiere at 8pm on 11 December. https://t.co/2zezYg8cyF

[Breakfast Television @breakfasttv]

A YouTuber’s science experiment has gone viral! @nickuhas recreated the elephant toothpaste experiment. It’s a mix of yeast, soap, hydrogen peroxide, potassium iodide, and sodium iodide.

But, instead of using 1 litre of hydrogen peroxide, Nick used 625 litres... 🤯

[Vanessa Spina, SNS @ketogenicgirl]

MUST SHARE!!! Watch in full food.lies TRY TO WATCH THIS AND NOT LAUGH: How we tricked the world into thinking meat was bad https://t.co/fFz2xJQ1kv (link in my IG… https://t.co/e8knMSexbW

[Thermapen @Thermapen_]

VALENTINE'S GIVEAWAY! WIN this fantastic bundle of goodies including a Red Thermapen Professional thermometer, box of Montezumas Chocolates PLUS a £25 M&S voucher for those Valentine's dinner essentials! Simply RT & follow to enter. Comp ends midnight 11/02/19. UK residents only.

[Alan Bell @SilverSeadog]

Which word applies to you ?

[Susie Dent @susie_dent]

Two words to cover the bases this morning: ‘crambazzled’ is old Yorkshire dialect meaning ‘prematurely aged from excess drinking’. ‘Matutinal’, on the other hand, means bright and cheery in the morning (to the annoyance of everyone else). Happy New Year.

[Alan Bell @SilverSeadog]

@magicfm You've flipped the switch that will lose you so many listeners. I for one will be off to another station. So OTT. Was the decision made by an over-excited 10 year old? Bye.

[Mark Topps @_mark_topps]

Have you seen @Clearcast banned @IcelandFoods #ChristmasAdvert for being political.. we think this is nonsense and the advert helps to spread a vital messages including #Deforestation. Please sign the petition by @_mark_topps and share https://t.co/FzKN2uXbG6 NoPalmOilChristmas

[Which? @WhichUK]

The only way to finally silence #NuisanceCalls is to hold company directors directly to account — nothing will shut them up like personally fining rogue bosses up to £500,000.

Today, the @dcms decides on whether or not to fine bad bosses — RT to help it make the right decision

[Alan Bell @SilverSeadog]

Too good to miss! https://t.co/h6xe2Phlwq

[Direct Charcoal Ltd @directcharcoal]

Hi Guys. Sorry its late in the week. To celebrate #UKBBQweek we are offering a prize of 10 bags of our 12kg Restaurant Grade charcoal delivered to our winner. Please message us and we will pick a random winner on Wednesday 18 July!! So please retweet and spread the word!!!

[Alan Bell @SilverSeadog]

@directcharcoal Yes please !!

[Weird Fish @WeirdFishTweets]

Flip flops are a holiday essential! This week, we're giving you the chance to win your favourite pair. Simply re-tweet this tweet before midday tomorrow to be in with a chance of winning. Good Luck! 👡🌞🏖 #Competition

[Alan Bell @SilverSeadog]

@herdyshepherd1 Thank you. You will be sorely missed.

[Q'Fest @QFestBarbecue]

The very special #qfest18 beer is ready. Come and join us and have a pint or two. Or three 🍺 We don't judge. We leave that to the barbecue judges 😉
https://t.co/fe0TRjjBrg ⬅️ for tickets.

[Q'Fest @QFestBarbecue]

Want to know what's on and when this weekend? Make sure you keep a copy of this tweet for all the information.
Book your tickets for #qfest18 here https://t.co/fe0TRjjBrg