Goonar Honderson

I tweet cause I’m sad and im sad cause I tweet

[Goonar Honderson @simps4bernie69]

J Jonah Jameson is really the Skip bayless to Spider-Man’s LeBron

[Richard Lawson @rilaws]

Odyssey is terrific. Comfortably seats eight and features the thoughtful engineering touches we’ve come to expect from Honda

[Rodger Sherman @rodger]

fireworks outside the visiting team hotels all night.... extreme heat and storms interrupting games ... unprecedented, suspicious administrative ruling undoing a suspension ...

sorry world you're on CONCACAF turf now. these concacolors don't run baby

[Paddy Raff @paddyraffcomedy]

Describing a Toblerone to someone who’s never had one before

[Around The NFL @AroundTheNFL]

Cam Skattebo believes full season will equate to big numbers for him: "I had 400 yards on 100 carries. When I play 17-plus games this year, it's going to be 300 carries for over 2,000 yards."

https://t.co/zBrGW980np

[jxke. 🧸🎰🃏 @cantguardjake]

This is like the Riddler releasing one photo per hour leading up to the draft

[Rob Daniels @oriolesfactoids]

One of my favorite factoids ever because it is so odd: @Orioles have won 8 straight games in which they have been picked off multiple times.
Starting with 1954, MLB teams actually have a winning record when picked off ≥ 2x (.5045), but this is still wild to me.
@Stathead

[Paul Landefeld @plandefeld410]

@MLBNetwork Gunnar is Gunnar but Elly could be anything! He could even be Gunnar Henderson!

[Chad Moriyama @ChadMoriyama]

Close to the funniest possible answer he could've given.

[Got CTE from playing Peek-a-Boo @doulbedoink]

Its honestly crazy how many trump supporters are just now waking up to the idea that he’s a lunatic lmfao how fucking stupid do you- (remembering it took me until december 2023 to realize justin fields was bad) the big tent strategy of politics of uptoast importense

[Justin🦩Boldaji @justinboldaji]

Telling everyone how impressive my first gay bareback orgy was

[FreeElChapo @cloutpriest]

Billy, this is Tiger Woods. He has amassed 15 major championships, is tied for the most PGA Tour wins, and has spent over a dozen years as the world’s number one golfer. His only defect is he cannot operate a motor vehicle.

[DecoPistons @DecoPistons]

Pra quem não acompanhou o jogo, segue uma imagem que resume bem a partida.

Simplesmente Jenkins levando seu pet PigDoncic pra passear...

#detroitbasketball

[Eli Ben-Porat 🇨🇦 @EliBenPorat]

Samuel Basallo has true 80 grade power. It doesn't get much better than that top line. Makes even better contact in the air. Recipe for 40+ HRs, wouldn't surprise me if he hits 50 in a full healthy season.

[Conner O'Malley @conner_omalley]

Irish Zionism

[John Mincone @JMincone]

Simply cannot lose in baseball to a country after capturing their President

[Red Drummarts @redrummarts]

Homelander after his redemption arc taking off the American cape and putting on an Israeli one

He then brings the supes to a land they can call their own. His compound Tel-aV. He's assisted by Huey and his team now called The Goys

[Qsama bin Johnston @QsamaBJohnston]

BREAKING: Iran is expected to interview notorious terrorist Greg Roman for its vacant Supreme Leader position, per @AdamSchefter.

[ShinyMcShine: Simpsons Quotes @ShinyMcShine_]

"Can we get rid of this ayatollah T-shirt? Khomeini died years ago."

"But, Marge, it works on any ayatollah-- Ayatollah Nakhbadeh, Ayatollah Zahedi. As we speak, Ayatollah Razmara and his cadre of fanatics are consolidating their power."

"I don't care who's consolidating their power."

[Anthony DiComo @AnthonyDiComo]

In hopes of increasing his velocity, Ryan Lambert once chugged nearly 1,000 raw eggs in a month.

Meet the 100-mph throwing, chicken-heart-eating Mets prospect who just may be the most eccentric player in camp:

https://t.co/78mHDH8AOU

[Onyx @OnyxOdds]

“Carson we need you, our seasons on the line here!”

Carson Beck: