We chase the wrong prize.
We want the visa, the title, the house, the milestone. And we treat the person we must become to earn them as an afterthought.
But the achievement is never the real reward.
The real reward is who you are forced to become in order to reach it. The discipline, the courage, the skill, the character built along the way.
Money can be lost. Titles can be taken. Milestones fade the week after you reach them.
But who you became to get there is yours forever, and it goes to work on the next goal on its own.
Stop asking only what you will get from your dream.
Start asking who you will become in the chasing of it.
The goal is temporary. The person it makes you is permanent.
For years I waited for someone to pick me.
I thought success worked like school. Do the work, wait quietly, and eventually the right authority notices you and hands you the next level.
That was my mistake, and it cost me time I cannot get back.
The real world does not run on permission. Nobody is coming to tap you on the shoulder and announce that it is finally your turn.
The people who move are the people who pick themselves. They start the project unasked. They claim the title before anyone grants it. They act as though it is already their turn, and the world eventually agrees.
Stop waiting to be chosen.
Choose yourself, and get to work as if the permission already came.
The only person whose yes you truly need is your own.
I uploaded my CV to ChatGPT, but instead of asking it to rewrite anything, I asked it 3 questions that completely shifted how I looked at my career.
You can do that, but you’re barely scratching the surface of what it can help you uncover.
These are the 3 questions I asked:
You don’t save to buy a car. You just wake up one morning and DECIDE to buy a car. You then use your savings (which was not intended for getting a car in the first place) plus small loan to finance the purchase.
Divide your annual income into 3:
1. One for rent
2. One for savings/investments, and/or emergencies
3. For household/self maintenance
This is how you know whether you are living within your means or above it.
Underrated life advice: Just be easy to work with. Show up on time. Do what you said you'd do. Bring solutions, not problems. Never create drama. Be responsive. Be emotionally consistent. Be kind. People will always want to support someone who just makes their life easier.
If you are broke and the first thing that comes into your mind is selling property to make more money, then you are walking on very dangerous terrain. It is not a sustainable way out of the problem of insufficient income.
If you now have to sell the property to pay off debts, then maybe you should seriously consider a career change and give up entrepreneurship.
I have seen former "big men" go through this phase and finally be saved when they open up, and their friends rally around them. This is why African politicians will always support corruption. Their income is never enough to sustain their lifestyle.
This is also what leads to all the bad side deals in the private sector and why they exclude outsiders from their circle.
For those in sports and entertainment, it is brutal. When Davido mentioned that his Dad would send him $300k after a show, I laughed because the man probably knows his burn rate and cash cycle better than anyone.
You can't plan a life around doing one-off deals, but you can plan a life around working with a group of people to generate constant income. The reason the Lebanese, Indians, and others are better businessmen in Africa is that the business groups they form are equivalent to corporations, with proper support and planning.
We have cooperatives, but they don't function the way the Lebanese and Indians in Africa do theirs. Most people in our cooperatives are typically there for emergency loans or crisis support. They don't see them as an active business organization that is responsible for their regular income.
An Indian friend I grew up with was one of the richest people I knew, but was also one of the most frugal. Any fancy car he was driving was usually one that he imported for sale. He was the one who wanted me to buy houses in Calabar almost 30 years ago at 100k Naira each, but I didn't see the value then. He bought several and housed his staff there.
He was always "switched on" and in moneymaking mode, and we did some interesting deals together while he still had his factories selling regular cheese balls and biscuits. That regular income from those factories was sacrosanct. Those were his core products; the side deals were for extra income.
For me, those side deals were my main source of income until my cousin, Lateef Belo-Osagie, made me see the folly of consulting and tech deals. He told me to go and get a job. I struggled with this until I took the course at HBS with @JosephBFuller, who gave us the truth about consulting and services. It was a zero equity game.
Find products to build and sell daily, or join a corporation or group that does. The lawyer guy who kept his 9-5 in the tweet I quoted earlier is very smart because a constant income source lets you plan better. The best business people I know sell something almost every hour. Sometimes, every minute.
If you don't have more income coming in than outgoing expenses, you are definitely going to end up in financial trouble. If you are in a group that does business together, you should all aim to generate regular income by selling products consistently.
Before we were chased away from the POS agent business by those with more resources, my dashboard showing regular income from those transactions used to give me more joy than anything else. These days, it is Stripe. Each sale gives me joy.
If you want to know what your future looks like, check your routine. They give the best outline.
It's how people know someone who's going places because habits have a way of telling the truth.
Watch your morning habits, the things you say, what you focus on during the day, what you eat or drink, and how you spend your quiet hours.
They always tell one of two things: how you’re either intentionally building your future or sleepwalking into it, one habit at a time.
I understand that the rent we see these days is really high, but rent control will only make it worse. I'd explain.
Prices are a consequence of the dynamics between demand and supply. Higher prices mostly result from a distortion in that dynamic.
I’ll tell you what, prayers work.
But don’t seek help from man, ask God.
Couple of months ago, I was on TikTok and I saw this girl that fix bike, I just kept feeling like dashing her money 😂, but I decided to just follow her.
For like two weeks o, you would think I was under a spell. Eventually, I got her contact and sent her something to buy some tools. She then told me how that had been a prayer point for weeks.
Iwo se ma be Olorun, Olorun a gbe alanu dide 🫶.