sirsimpp

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

me:*pours heart out for my crush and asks her out*

her:

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

me when my girl introduces me as her boyfriend to her hot grandpa

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

pov: you walk into an american school after a shooting

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

nobody:
crowd at a rod wave concert when he’s about to stage dive:

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

me: you finna let me smash😏?
someones grandma:

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

me after putting my sperm in a cup and telling my boy its milk😳

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

pov: your grandpa just died of Alzheimer’s and he forgets he’s dead

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

when you realise during marriage, that getting married means you have to cut off all your sidehoes

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

how most of my convos with my grandma go

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

anime girl PFP accounts after accidentally going live and revealing they’re a 45 year old man

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

me:*uses front camera as mirror to shave my a$$*
rest of my zoom class:

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

trump making a new twitter after getting banned

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

horny mfs commenting on every post ash kaash makes on the gram

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

when my roommate asks why i still have a beard after borrowing his trimmer

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

maths teachers when you get the answer right but didn’t use their method

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

the homeless kid when the teacher sets homework

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

*titanic literally fucking sinking*

lobsters who were about to be cooked:

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

i may be down bad but i still make mfs laugh😓💯

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

*crush sends me nudes*

whatsapp hq:

[sirsimpp @sirsimpp]

me trying to explain to my teacher why i didn’t do the homework